


Press Your Lips to my Sun-Kissed Skin

by Anonymous



Category: IT (Movies - Muschietti)
Genre: 69 (Sex Position), Accidental Stimulation, Anal Fingering, Anal Sex, Ass to Mouth, Awkward Boners, Awkward Sexual Situations, Awkwardness, Blow Jobs, Childhood Friends, Come Swallowing, Comeplay, First Kiss, First Time Blow Jobs, Fluff, Fluff and Smut, Friends With Benefits, Friends to Lovers, Hand Jobs, Kissing, Love Confessions, M/M, Making Love, Making Out, Masturbation, Masturbation in Bathroom, Public Sex, Rimming, Shyness, Sleep Sex, Smut, Soft Eddie Kaspbrak/Richie Tozier, Summer, Sweat, The Hammock (IT), Thighs, Tickling, Wrestling
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-23
Updated: 2020-05-28
Packaged: 2021-03-02 20:53:56
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Underage
Chapters: 6
Words: 28,173
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24333151
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/
Summary: Eddie Kaspbrak's best friend Richie Tozier has an accident that sends their entire friendship into a totally unexpected direction, one filled with swapping spit and sweating in the heat and maybe something a little more than they were to jump to admit. It's the Summer that changes Eddie's life, the Summer he will never forget.
Relationships: Eddie Kaspbrak & Richie Tozier, Eddie Kaspbrak/Richie Tozier
Comments: 74
Kudos: 500
Collections: Anonymous





	1. First Car Ride

When Eddie had heard that Mike had gotten his own car it made him tense up with concern. They were now old enough to drive, the seven of them. Eddie didn’t think he could touch the leather of a steering wheel, let alone actually control a vehicle on the road. Rather than being down about this, he was scared. Scared of losing the way he and his friends used to be, riding their bikes around town in a pack, exploring the woods, hopping into the quarry to nearly freeze to death. But now Mike had a  _ car _ , he could go anywhere he would like by himself, no matter how far away. You couldn’t steer a car through the thick trees of a forest, nor could you drop it on the lawn of your best friend’s house before chasing them inside to read comic books together. Eddie didn’t want to change the way things were, he liked them the way they had always been, despite a few minor grievances. To him, change was forgetting who you were and replacing it with something new. How could he do that to his childhood? Especially when there were so many moments he didn’t want to let go of? Sure, he wanted to get out of Derry as fast as he could and never look back, but . . . He would never let go of the moments he cherished most in the world. Especially when it came to the moments with his friends. 

So, on the day Mike had gotten a brand new (to Mike it was brand new, but in actuality it was beaten and rusted and the definition of someone’s ‘first car’) ride, Eddie and the rest of his friends agreed to take a drive inside. Eddie felt sick to his stomach when he first saw the thing. It had occurred to him that he had never even seen Mike drive and he didn’t know if he was good at it or not. This had Eddie bouncing on his feet in worried anticipation, furrowing his eyebrows so hard it caused him to burst a headache. The rest of them seemed excited, like they couldn’t wait to risk everything they had known for something new. 

When he finally arrived, everyone piled in, Eddie hanging in the back as he heard them start to exclaim and laugh and get into their seats. Mike was smiling pleasantly back at them, his face adorned with excitement. As Eddie began to climb in after them, he stopped, lips parting. “Where do  _ I  _ sit?” he asked, eyes traveling the car to find an open spot. Mike and Bill were in front, Richie and Ben and Stan and Bev somehow squeezing in the back. They looked around, as if there was a secret seat hiding in the cup holders or on the floor. Eddie felt relieved for a moment, maybe he really didn’t have to get inside. Maybe he would just say he could walk home by himself and skip out on the drive around town they had planned. Yes, that’s what he would do. 

Eddie opened his mouth to respond, almost getting words out before he was interrupted.

“I guess you’ll just have to sit on Richie’s lap,” Beverly quipped, causing most of them to let out laughter, especially Bill who let out a bark so abruptly he nearly choked in the passenger seat, confirming Eddie’s suspicions of the car being dangerous.

“ _ What? _ ” Richie complained. “Why does he have to sit on mine?” he said quickly enough that it hurt, his mouth gaping at Beverly as he threw his hands out.

“Yeah,” Eddie agreed, trying not to mind his best friend’s words. He tried to think of something to follow that up with, something about how he should sit in someone else’s lap, anyone other than Richie, but he took too long to think of anything.

“Because you’re  _ always  _ in each other's space,” Stan told them. “Why should  _ we _ have to suffer? And plus, Eddie’s small. It’s not like he’s going to crush you or anything.” He said this like it was obvious, like all five of them just assumed that this was how it would go down.

Eddie let a whining noise out from the back of his throat, leaning his head under the car’s roof so the blinding sun wasn’t in his eyes. “That is  _ so _ not safe. What if Mike crashed the car? What if I slam my head into the seat and get head trauma and be disabled for the rest of my life? What if the police see us and pull us over and Mike gets arrested all because of me and we get thrown into jail and we live the rest of our lives as delinquents and-”

There were multiple groans radiated through the vehicle, Stan rolling his eyes.

“C’mon, Eddie,” Mike said. “It’ll be fine, I promise I’ll drive slow.”

This hardly quelled his fear, but the six pairs of eyes staring at him made his stomach stir with shame.  _ He _ was holding them back from having any fun even if that was the last thing he wanted to do, all because he wasn’t ready for one of them to grow up. It was selfish. So, Eddie took a deep breath, and he had made the hard decision of sacrificing his own safety and happiness so that his friends could enjoy.

He distressfully climbed inside, Beverly shutting the door behind him. He crouched, stepping over pairs of feet to get to the window seat that was already occupied, before sitting down uncomfortably onto Richie’s lap. He felt stiff, it was unnerving feeling so much of Richie at one time. The tall boy under him rested his left elbow on the ridge just before the door handle, his right hand between him and Ben, feeling uncomfortable (also looking uncomfortable as well, unbeknownst to Eddie). Their friends gave a few hushed giggles, making Eddie lower his eyelids.

“Okay, can we go now?” Richie asked, angered. His voice was strained, sticking to his throat and sounding choked.

Eddie didn’t know why he was acting this way, assuming it was because they had annoyed each other so much in the past that he must’ve thought this was just another attempt to get on Richie’s nerves. As Mike started driving it became even more apparent that this was true. Eddie was holding on for dear life, adjusting himself on the other’s lap by pushing his hips back. He clenched his eyes shut as the car got faster, his friends starting up conversations about what they wanted to do during the Summer, what they wanted to do later that day, and whatever else he didn’t pay attention to. His mind kept drifting on the thought that they might drive past a parked policeman and any second he would hear the sirens following them, alerting Mike to pull over to the side of the road.

Eddie instinctively scooched backward, his back being pressed against the other’s front in an attempt to try and not be as visible from outside of the window. Richie flinched at this, shooting his hand up to grab at Eddie’s hip, probably to calm him down.

He opened his eyes to look outside finally, viewing the shops and diners and pharmacies. There were tons of people walking outside. Kids with dripping ice cream cones and couples with their fingers interlocked. Adults with purses hanging off their shoulders, looking exhaustedly at their wild children. It was early June, the sun finally starting to blaze after a cold winter that had spilled into the spring. Eddie loved the Summer, it was the only time he could really be himself, whilst he was among his friends and not stuck inside with his mother.

They drove a bit out of town, down an old gravel road that they sometimes traveled to get away from all the commotion at the center of Derry. It was nearly deserted, except for a single car coming from the opposite way. The road was lined with trees, their leaves puffing out and swaying softly, providing shade. He wished to be under one of them, sitting against it, instead of in the car. It was getting more bearable to be there, but he still couldn’t understand the appeal of getting a vehicle. Social status? Bragging rights? A way to escape your home that was really just a house so you could forget about everything for a while? Eddie didn’t know, not until he had done it himself, which he could not see happening in the foreseeable future. Those were the things he had heard said about getting your own car, rumors. Maybe he should ask Mike what all the fuss was about after-

Eddie felt a wave of horrific realization, feeling Richie’s hard dick suddenly press against his ass as the car went over a bump.

Richie jumped behind him, letting out a sad muffled noise.

Eddie’s limbs froze in place, only focusing on the sudden feeling under him. His breath caught in his throat.  _ Oh my God _ , he thought.  _ Holy fuck. What the fuck. Oh my fucking God this is- _ He was in front of the class, giving a presentation, stumbling over his words. He was telling his mother for the first time that he knew about his placebo medicine. He had been screamed at by Henry Bowers in front of his classmates that he was a fag. His heart was in his stomach, hands starting to shake. Horrified, afraid, confused. What should he do? What should he say? Why is this happening to him?

Richie leaned forward, his breath coming out in fast waves, moving to whisper in the boy’s ear. “ _ Shit, Eds, fuck _ , I’m so fucking sorry. I didn’t- I don’t- It’s just you keep  _ pressing on my- _ ”

The car went over another bump, Eddie feeling Richie’s cock’s outline pressing in between his ass cheeks, making him silently gasp. He turned his head behind him, whispering angrily back. “What the _ hell _ , Rich! What the fuck! Why are you-”

“I can’t help it!”

Eddie tried to lean forward but only ended up putting more pressure against both of them. He quickly looked to his friends, praying that they hadn’t noticed anything off. Thankfully, there were two separate conversations happening at the same time, their attention elsewhere. He felt Richie press his forehead against his back, a gesture which he shouldn’t have found as strangely sweet. The rising in the pavement wouldn’t stop coming, Richie eventually grabbing his hips with both hands.  _ Is he pulling me down? He is. He’s pulling me down on his dick. _ In subtle moments, the other yanked him down whenever there was a crack or pothole or rock under the tires, passing it off as just a reaction to that. Eddie craned his head back. “ _ Richie, wh- _ ”

“Just let me-” Richie pressed his member firmly through the fabric of his own jeans and Eddie’s shorts, applying friction against his hole.

Eddie let a noise out, putting his head down and towards the window to hide himself from the others. This was much worse than a police officer pulling them over for him not being properly seated. He was under the impression that any moment his friends could look beside them and notice his best friend was getting off to humping him  _ right there _ . Eddie ground his teeth together, red spreading over his face like a spilled drink on a table. He looked down between his legs in horror to see himself stiff and hardening, immediately covering it with his forearms. What was happening? What should he do? Why did his body seem to be enjoying this? Richie was a  _ boy _ . He didn’t have tits or long hair and he didn’t wear skirts. He didn’t dress in pink or paint his nails or play with dolls. He was a dirty lanky  _ boy _ , grime under his fingernails and crooked teeth. He told crude jokes and chewed with his mouth open and had a  _ dick _ .

This thought made Eddie full on moan, almost inaudibly, thank God. Richie heard it though, he knew he did, because he sped up his moments just slightly in reaction, breathing loudly through his nose against the side of Eddie’s neck before he gave a few long sputtering ruts. Eddie soon felt some sort of wetness on the backside of his shorts after he stopped completely, his own eyes shutting.  _ Did he just- _

“Hey, Eddie,” Bill suddenly said from the front seat.

Eddie’s eyes shot open, his body flinching as he thought,  _ Oh God oh fuck we’ve been caught they’re gonna hate me they’re going to be so mad- _

“Do you want to see Batman Returns or Alien 3?”

Eddie didn’t understand at first, eyebrows pressing together to form a thin line between them. He had been sure they were going to get yelled at, maybe even be told that they would leave them there on the side of the road to walk home by themselves. “I . . . “ He shook his head, trying to push out an answer even if he could feel Richie softening under him and could feel himself still hard and awake in his shorts. “Batman,” he finally settled on.

“Oh jeez,” Stan muttered. “I told you you should’ve asked Richie first. Now  _ Richie _ has to break the tie,” he said, groaning. 

“Sorry,” Bill responded with a laugh, acknowledging that that was true, and yes, it was a bad decision because Richie always wanted to pick whatever the rest didn’t want to see, giving him the perfect opportunity to foil their plans. “Well, what about it, Rich? Alien or Batman?”

It took him a while to say anything, completely the opposite of Richie Tozier, quiet and reserved. “Alien,” he said, voice rough.

Half of them groaned, the rest cheering. Eddie wanted to say  _ fuck you _ in response, of course he had to pick the other option. He knew it was just to spite him. But, he had more pressing issues to deal with, like the fact that his best friend had just come in his pants from grinding against his ass. Eddie crossed his ankles, biting his lip. He had noticed they were going back and breathed a sigh of relief. Behind him, Richie was stiff as a board, not making a single noise or a minuscule movement. Eddie wished he would say something, anything. A stupid joke or an apology, he didn’t care. Anything but this terrifying silence.

Were they going to the movie theater now? After a few minutes of driving they went past Ben’s and Eddie’s own house, solidifying his thought.  _ No! What am I supposed to do with  _ this _?  _ He nearly cried when they parked down a side street near the theater, his friends exiting the car one by one. He hurriedly opened their door up, slipping off of Richie’s lap to the pavement. When his feet hit ground he started to run, angling himself away from the others.

“Eddie!” Ben called out. “Where are you going?”

“I have to go to the bathroom,” he called over his shoulder, slowing down for a moment. “Buy my ticket for me, wouldya? I’ll pay you back!”

He tried his best to weave in between the passerby on the sidewalk, desperately hoping he was doing enough to hide the tent in his shorts. This might’ve been the most embarrassing moment of his life, come to think of it. It definitely outweighed the time he walked in class late and slipped on the floor in front of everyone. And the time where his mother had brought him to his aunt’s house and told her about most of his private secrets. Those experiences were almost nothing to Eddie then, as he ran into the theater’s empty bathroom and locked himself in the first stall (the first stall was always the cleanest because of the fact everyone thought it would be the dirtiest). His fingertips were shaking, his head drowsy from the thought of what had happened. He carefully, painfully slowly, covered the seat with toilet paper. After that was done, he stood in place, staring down. He had come in here to . . . Eddie shook his head. No, he couldn’t. He wouldn’t. 

But, Eddie  _ was _ achingly hard in his shorts and it didn’t show any signs of stopping now. If he did sit down, if he really finished the job, what would that mean?  _ I’m not like that _ , he told himself.  _ I’m not . . . I don’t like that _ . He pulled his shorts and underwear off in one smooth movement, spinning around to sit.  _ I didn’t get turned on by that.  _ Eddie grabbed himself softly at first, biting his lip once again. He thought of Richie’s grip on his hips.  _ I like girls.  _ Richie’s forehead on his back.  _ I’m not some kind of- _ Eddie wiped his thumb over the head of his dick, spreading the precum across it as he thought of Richie grinding into him. He let out a groan.  _ I’m not jerking off because of  _ him _ , I’m jerking off because- _ Yet, he thought of Richie coming in his pants from just humping him and whined out into the stall, picking up the speed of his fist. He just needed to get this over with so he could continue with his day and forget this had ever happened. This, however, was something that was easier said than done.

He was getting so close, eager to let go of his shameful tension. Eddie didn’t do this often, and he definitely had never gone at it with such energy. He told himself it was all because he just wanted to get it over with, ignoring the other options. He threw his head back so he couldn’t see himself, almost finished.

“Eds?” he heard from outside the stall, an awkward timid word that was undoubtedly made by one Richie Tozier.

Eddie jumped like in the car, only this time afraid that Richie would’ve caught him instead of the others. What would he think? He mustered up enough courage to answer, letting his hand go still. “Yeah?” he choked out.

Richie’s beat-up slip-on shoes could vaguely be seen under the door, one incessantly tapping against the tiles. He stayed silent for a while, uneasy breaths being passed between the two boys. His presence made Eddie feel shivery and nervous, anticipating the other’s next move with worry. “Uh,” Richie started, not sounding like himself. “Bev wanted to know if you wanted butter on your popcorn,” he told him dully, as if he was occupied with something else. Probably his own thoughts.

He was utterly shocked by what he heard, something unexpected and completely off-topic. He squeezed his dick mindlessly, pressing his lips together in a thin line.  _ Oh _ ,  _ so we’re just ignoring it? Thank God.  _ “Obviously. Who doesn’t get butter on their popcorn?” he asked, trying his best to sound unphased but mostly failing miserably.

Richie let out a chuckle devoid of any actual humor. “Maniacs. Stan.”

Eddie responded with an awkward laugh, sending them into more silence. To his surprise, the boy then heard Richie’s footsteps travel away from the stall and out of the door, leaving him alone once again. He wanted to blow out a breath of relief, but almost felt cheated out of something. He had been thankful at first for the situation being ignored, but Eddie couldn’t help it. He wanted to hear what Richie would say about it. He must’ve been too grossed out to do so.

Eddie half-heartedly finished, getting a mediocre orgasm in return due to the humiliation that he felt, before washing his hands and meeting his friends in the lobby of the theater, not speaking or looking at Richie once.

The time he spent watching the movie was really time spent inside his head. Richie would usually sit in the seat beside him when they saw flicks, the two of them chatting the entire time, having to be shushed by their own friends because they were so bothersome. He liked the way they clicked, the way Richie would whisper terrible jokes in his ear and he would laugh from how bad they were. Not because of anything special, just because he was his best friend, and that was it. Nonetheless, he missed it. Richie was on the complete opposite end of their row of friends. Eddie had looked over at him a few times, every glance showing the same thing: Richie staring at the floor in thought.

After the movie was over Eddie walked home alone, unable to muster up the courage to ride in the car again, especially when he would have to sit on a certain someone’s lap the entire drive. He thanked Mike for the trip, leaving his group of friends early to hurry to the safety of his house.


	2. Reading Comic Books and Wrestling

It was Friday. Richie came over on Fridays. Sure, he came over on other days of the week as well, but he hadn’t failed coming over on a Friday for as far back as Eddie could remember. This, Eddie thought, would be the first time he wouldn’t arrive to hang out with him. There was no doubt in his mind of this being true, how could it not be? The two of them hadn’t said a single word to each other since the time in the bathroom five days prior. Eddie hadn’t even gone out as much as he usually would, too much anxiety in his chest to function in front of people. He spent most of his days watching cliche soap operas with his mother in the living room, hating every second of it. This day though, he decided to sit in his room and read Marvel comic books, lying on his stomach on top of his bed. He was reaching for a new one from the stack set beside him when the bedroom door opened.

His mother was gone for work, so he knew who it was immediately, his heart stuttering in response. 

“Hey, Eds,” Richie said nonchalantly, shutting the door with a click and slipping his shoes off (that was a rule Eddie had made for him when he entered his bedroom, Richie had to take his shoes off so he couldn’t bring dirt in from outside). He walked to the bed, dropping his backpack to the floor as he sat down. Eddie’s body rocked at the abrupt movement before he sat up. “You reading Iron Man?” he asked, squinting his eyes behind his glasses at the stack of his comic books.

Okay, Eddie could do this. If Richie was acting nonchalant, so could he. “Not yet, I was reading Captain America until  _ you  _ interrupted me,” he quipped, shooting an eyebrow up.

Richie rolled his eyes. “You knew I was coming over.” He took a comic book and scooched up against the wall beside the bed, sticking his long thin legs out in front of him. “I had to cancel my date with your mom for this, so don’t be  _ ungrateful _ .” He opened the comic dramatically, revealing the front page. It was an Ant-Man.

Effortlessly, like nothing was out of the ordinary, Eddie kicked him in the shin. “Shut up, Richie,” he stated, sighing in frustration. “I’d be grateful if you were dead.”

Richie let out a laugh at that, Eddie following suit. His chest swelled with gratitude, they were okay. After all of the worry. Eddie had no trouble convincing himself that it was alright that they never talked about it and moved on from the subject, it was best to forget about it in his eyes. He was not mad at Richie for what he had done, nor questioning of why he had done it, thinking, why bother? Frankly, he couldn’t even remember what had happened in the first place. Nothing even happened. Definitely not.

After reading comics for a while they both seemed antsy, Eddie whining out an, “ _ I’m bored, _ ” and flopping back onto his pillow. He watched Richie’s profile, the boy not even blinking at his words. Eddie huffed through his nose, furrowing his brow as he kicked him in the leg once more. Again, nothing. So, he continued, letting out a string of “ _ Richie _ ,”s while continuing the methodical movement. “Dickface _.  _ Dick-for-brains. Dickhead.”

Finally, Richie relented, letting out a groan and trying to move away, grabbing Eddie’s ankle to stop him. “Stop being a little shit,” he told him.

“But, I’m  _ bored _ .”

“I bet your mom is bored right now. She must be so lonely without me. Poor thing.” He gave him a look, before returning his eyes to the comic yet not quite reading. He was waiting.

Eddie watched the corner of Richie’s mouth twitch and nearly let out a wide toothy childish grin in reaction, but held himself together. _I should be annoyed, dammit._ _He just joked about your mother for chrissake._ He let his barely-there expression completely fall and kicked him again. “Fuck off, Trashmouth. Why do you have to talk about my mom all the time?”

Richie let out a laugh “What, can’t I talk about the love of my life every now and then? Jeez.”

He looked at Eddie with an expecting smile, so he gave in and threw his comic book down to lunge at Richie. “Take that back, you fucker!” he exclaimed, trying to hold him still so he could hit the other. “Take it back!”

Richie only laughed and started pushing back, easily fending off the small boy. Eddie started to press his palms into his shoulders, shoving him. Richie had obviously had enough of this, springing forward to grab around his waist and send them to the floor, both letting out laughs of surprise when they thumped to the carpet. Richie was trying to pin him down by his arms. He came up with an idea (which was unfair yet the only answer), Eddie trailing his fingers up to his neck to tickle there, making him jump and point his chin to the ground with a laugh. He took the opportunity to push Richie away and get up on his knees and try to push  _ him _ down. But Richie had caught wind of this early, hastily reaching up to grab his wrists.

“ _ Fucking loser! _ ”

Eddie was pushing as hard as he could, falling forward to keep balanced. His face was growing hot as he laughed at himself trying to squirm his way out of the other’s grip.

This went on for a few minutes, each pushing each other over and laughing and getting red in the face, throwing curses back and forth. Richie had the clear advantage, being way too tall for his own good. But, Eddie still had some tricks up his sleeve. He would never give up if he was put in a compromising position, almost being pinned. He would tickle or shove his way out, no matter how much he was out of breath. Soon, they were both sweating, he could smell it. To his surprise, he didn’t really give a shit.

In the five days they had been away from each other, Eddie nearly constantly thought about the other boy. The way they had been pressed so tightly together in the car. It was more intimate this way, face to face most of the time they were wrestling. They had wrestled with each other since they were younger, but it had never been like this. This was full of relieved laughter and faces mere inches apart and prolonged eye contact. Red faces and wide smiles, no matter how much they yelled at each other.

Eddie had touched himself to the thought of touching Richie again.

In the midst of their fight, Richie had gotten on his feet, squatting to use his body weight to weigh on him. Eddie had swept his feet out from under him and they both went tumbling, rolling over to where Eddie ended up straddling the other, knees on either side of his hips. He had Richie’s wrists in his hold and pressed against the white carpet. He had won. They shared fast shallow breaths and laughter for a moment before calming down, steadying themselves.

When Eddie felt  _ it _ , he pulled his hands away, eyes blown wide. He gaped awkwardly for a moment, finding the words as he stared at Richie’s helpless face. “You- you did it again. Richie, you- it’s-” He lifted his hips up to hover over Richie’s, away from his boner. Eddie was still leaning down though, he felt the urge to stay there.

Richie looked cowardly, grimacing and sticking his hands over his face. “What the fuck is wrong with me?” he mumbled to himself. “I didn’t mean to, I didn’t mean to.” 

He must’ve not seen or felt Eddie’s own hard-on. Eddie didn’t even pay it any mind, looking down at the other with lowered eyelids and his lip trapped between his teeth for him to gnaw on. Nervously, he asked, “Why did you, uh, why did you get it?” voice almost a whisper.

Richie took his hands away from his eyes, still not looking at the other boy though. “I don’t know,” he quietly said. “I’m sorry. I just- We’re just touching a lot, okay? I’m not like  _ that _ or anything. It’s just that we’re touching too much.” He looked frustrated, holding back a flood of word-vomit.

Eddie nodded. “That must be it for me too then,” he concluded, looking down.

He heard the silence, heard the moment Richie realized what he meant by those words.

It was a vulgar sight to see, a tent in both their shorts. Eddie wasn’t sure what to do next, all he knew was that he couldn’t stop staring at Richie’s. It was different seeing someone else turned on. Sure, you’ve seen yourself more times than you could count, but seeing your best friend is a different story. It’s like you’ve unlocked a secret hidden feature to them, something you couldn’t really imagine properly or exactly estimate what it would be like, what it would look like. Now that Eddie knew, he wasn’t sure what to do with the information. Apparently neither did Richie.

“Are you . . . ?” He coughed out the words like a sickness, eyebrows pressed firmly together.

Eddie looked at his face, lips parting. “Well so are  _ you _ ,” he spit out angrily.

“Yeah, but-”

“You’re such an asshole. You’re the one who got hard first. In the car. You’re the one who couldn’t help yourself from fucking . . . I don’t know,  _ humping _ me.”

“Maybe if you didn’t look like that, then I wouldn’t have,” he snapped.

“If I didn’t look like what?”

“Like- like- A girl!”

“I don’t look like a  _ girl! _ ”

“That’s the reason why this happened to me.”

“ _ No, I do not _ . You’re just angry ‘cause you got your dick hard for a boy!”

“Well, so did you!” he yelled, words rough and crumbling around the edges, throwing them into silence.

Eddie swallowed hard, heart flaming with outrage. He clenched his fists together, unable to tell if he wanted to punch the other or not. Richie was no one to talk that way, they were in the same boat. Richie was the one who caused this problem in the first place, he was the reason why Eddie couldn’t stop himself from feeling the way he felt. It was ridiculous. So ridiculous, in fact, that Eddie let out a noise from the back of his throat. A giggle. This burst into outright laughter, squeezing his eyes shut. He heard Richie huff through his nose but then joined along, too, both laughing hard.

His eyes were getting teary, hearing Richie say, “What’s wrong with us?”

This only made the two of them laugh harder, chests shaking and stuttering. Eddie didn’t want to laugh, but he couldn’t stop himself. They needed to figure this out, to talk about what was happening. He needed to find the truth in Richie, in what had happened between them and what was currently happening. But, he just couldn’t stop losing his shit over something so unfunny it became funny. 

This came to an abrupt stop when Eddie forgot their situation and let himself drop down to sit on Richie’s crotch again, reminding them both of what was supposed to be being discussed. He didn’t move away again, only let his laughter quickly die down and held his guard.

Richie had died down too, letting his head fall back against the carpet, dark hair flopping as he did so. His glasses were crooked, eyes staring back at him. “Eddie?”

“What?”

He looked quite scared, a little unsure with himself. His throat bobbed as he swallowed, opening his mouth to finally speak. “Can I ask you something? But- Something that might be really, really weird?”

“Everything you say is weird,” Eddie settled on saying, waiting for the something in question to be spoken.

He swallowed once more. “Do you . . . wanna do stuff? It doesn’t have to be weird or anything, we can just . . . “

“Do what?” Eddie questioned, not understanding.

Richie ignored this, continuing to blabber on. “I saw it in a few movies. We’re friends, so, you know, it’s like we’re just helping each other out. It doesn’t mean anything. And it could be fun, or something. Then it won’t be weird if . . . if this happens again. I mean, if you want to- we don’t have to do anything you don’t want. I just thought it could be something we could try out, but it’s totally fine if you-”

_ " _ _ What?" _ Eddie said loudly, finally understanding what he was talking about after all the incoherent things Richie was saying. “ _ You would want to do that!? _ ” he asked, starting to whisper-yell even if they were alone.

“It’s not a big deal,” he said, sounding like he didn’t even believe his own words. 

Eddie’s heart felt like it would fail any moment with how fast its speed had increased. What should he do? What would he say? He felt trapped, answering him either way would end up having a certain connotation. Also, he was worried this was all a joke. That’s all the two ever did, pick on each other and jokingly annoy the other. Eddie didn’t know how to tell if he was kidding or not. And maybe he didn’t even want to. Because Eddie estimated what he would feel if the other said this was all a prank and he didn’t want to feel that kind of sorrow. So, with no looking back, he just blurted out what came to his mind, his silence growing too awkward for him to handle.

“Fine.”

Richie’s eyebrows nearly flew from his forehead, his dick jumping carelessly against Eddie’s own erection. “Really?”

“I said fine, didn’t I?”

“I just want to be sure you’re sure.”

“I am.”

Richie nodded, eyes wide and unblinking. “Alright,” he softly said.

Eddie nodded back, slipping off of Richie (the other boy looked confused at this, maybe a little disappointed) to sit up against the bed. Eddie motioned for him to do the same, neither speaking a word for the moment it took for him to do so. “So, what do we, you know . . . ?”

Richie looked away from his face, observing the room for a moment. Eddie’s heart was beating too fast to handle, his breath nearly choking as it traveled down his throat. “Wanna make out?” Richie asked unashamedly, returning his eyes. “And we can, like . . .” Eddie stared at him uneasily. “Touch each other.”

Eddie could do nothing but nod, surveying Richie’s lips. They didn’t look as chapped as usual, but he didn’t really care if they were or not. He just wanted to know how it felt to touch them. To touch other places of his as well.

Toward each other they moved, each holding their breath. Neither had ever kissed anyone before. When their lips did touch Eddie thought,  _ Oh. So this is what it’s supposed to feel like _ . He furrowed his brows, eyes closed as they pressed together. Richie moved his mouth while they were connected, making his stomach squirm relentlessly. He breathed in through his nose as they both pushed at each other with their mouths. He remembered that they were supposed to ‘make out’ and it ushered him to bring his tongue out, fearful this might be  _ too _ intimate the way it was.

To his shock, Richie let out a small noise from the appearance of the other’s tongue, hurriedly pushing his own back.

They had no idea what they were doing or how to do it, but that didn’t mean Eddie didn’t like it any less. Maybe he liked it too much. The inside of Richie’s mouth tasted like some sort of junk food he couldn’t put his finger on and a vague flavor of cigarettes. At this realization, he opened his mouth wider, their lips smooshing together whilst their tongues explored, trying to get more of that taste. It was  _ wet _ , saliva threatening to drip from their chins and down their necks. He didn’t know when to stop, pushing his face forward so much so that he was leaning over Richie.

This only seemed to spur Richie on in return, long thin hands dancing up from the floor to his thighs, one staying there while the other held his boney hip. They came up with a solid rhythm for their mouths. The hand that Richie had on his thigh moved inwards. Eddie made a small noise against his mouth, pushing his hips forward to encourage him to keep going. And that’s when it happened, Richie pressing his palm against Eddie’s crotch.

He broke away from his mouth, giving the essence of a whine. “It feels good, Rich,” he nodded, scooting impossibly closer and sitting back down again. “Should I touch you too? Do you want me to?”

“Yeah, do it,” he assured him. 

So, Eddie did, reaching down to feel over Richie’s boner, hard and heavy in his shorts. “You’re kinda big, I think,” he noted. He pressed his hand there, Richie groaning quietly and moving in to kiss Eddie on the cheek, pressing the sides of their faces together after. It felt so strange to be touching someone else like this, especially when it was his best friend. But the thing was, he wanted to do it. He liked that it was making Richie feel good.

The taller boy then quickly slipped his hands down the front of Eddie’s shorts, pulling his member out into the cool air.

He gasped, letting out an, “ _ Oh jeez. _ ”

Richie kissed his cheek again, eyebrows furrowed as he started to jerk him off slowly. 

Eddie shut his eyes, trying not to moan. He didn’t want to, it felt inappropriate to make such a noise with his friend. But it was so  _ good _ , he liked the way someone else’s hands on him felt, he liked the way Richie worked his wrist and softly pressed down on his slit with the pad of his thumb. He needed something to take his mind off of it so it wouldn’t be over so quick. So, he unbuttoned Richie’s shorts, pulling the zipper and then his underwear down to touch him out in the open too. 

“ _ Fuck _ ,” the other cursed.

His skin felt soft despite him being rock hard, the head wet. Eddie let himself look down at this, staring at his hand firmly gripping Richie’s cock and pumping it in his fist. He let out a quiet,  _ “Oh _ ,” at the sight, entranced by it. Richie was moving his own hand faster, Eddie swallowing down his groans. He had slightly slicked him up with his precum.  _ Precum _ , Eddie thought, viewing the wetness of it. He wanted  _ more _ , he wanted Richie to actually come. He wanted to hear him moan because of it. He wanted Richie to make him come too.

Eddie sped up his hand significantly, embarrassingly moaning in the process of just getting into what they were doing. He looked at Richie touching him, making noise at that as well. 

Richie pressed his face into his hair, brokenly saying,”That’s good, Eds, that’s- you do it really good.”

Eddie felt proud of that, letting out a small laugh at the other’s word choice and how affected it sounded. It was cut off mid-laugh though, Richie starting to touch him at a rapid pace, using his other hand to feel his balls, rubbing them. “ _ Richie _ , I- Fuck-” He was going to do it, he could feel himself about to let go. But he was worried, was it okay to do so? Would it be weird? Would  _ Richie  _ find it weird?

It was too late to ask however, Richie whispering to him, “Jesus fuck, you sound cute. You sound  _ pretty _ ,” Eddie coming all over his hand.

He thought he was fucked, he would be in a coma of embarrassment for the rest of his life, especially with how fast he had finished. But, to his absolute shock, Richie came right after, letting out a sigh into his ear. Eddie had the frightening realization that he didn’t think it looked gross when he watched it happen, he actually let out a soft moan as his own orgasm was ending, wishing he could . . . He didn’t know what he wanted to do with it, but he knew he wanted more than to touch it.

Richie pulled back slowly, eyelids heavy. He sank forward to press one last kiss to his lips. Eddie’s heart thumped sporadically, wondering if that was okay, if it was allowed. He had no problem with pressing back though.

Richie nodded when he broke away, his glasses askew on his face. “Yeah, we should do that more.”

And thus started one of Eddie Kaspbrak’s favorite Summers of his entire life.


	3. The Clubhouse

They couldn’t stop. Nearly every day, every chance they got, the two of them snuck off to be alone and make each other feel good. Eddie had come to memorize what Richie’s mouth tasted like, the way he felt in his hand. Their friends hadn’t even suspected a thing and neither did his mother, thank God. That was the only thing he was worried about, his mother. Her somehow finding out what they had been doing or catching them in the act. But, Richie had assured him that she wouldn’t. After all, they only ever did it when Eddie’s mom was gone or at Richie’s own house.

Or, once or twice, in their friends’ clubhouse.

The first time they had done it there was the first time it had gone any farther than hand jobs and making out, something that would escalate their relation to new and unexplored heights.

The seven friends had just come from their homes to get some things from the underground clubhouse, each methodically stepping down the ladder. They were supposed to be going to Ben’s house afterward, trying to hurry and grab everything they needed. Of course, Richie plopped down onto the hanging hammock in the middle of the structure, hanging his head over the side and groaning. “You guys are so  _ lame _ ,” he complained. “Why can’t we just say here?”

“Because we always hang out here,” Stanley said from across the room, more focused on what he was doing than what Richie was saying. He had unzipped his backpack to pile in things from the desk, putting them in in an orderly fashion.

Eddie already had all he needed, almost every time he left home with his friends he brought his backpack full of a multitude of things from his own house, most items objects that they would never need yet he insisted they should bring them just in case. He set his backpack next to the hammock, shoving Richie’s annoyingly long legs over so he could sit on the other end. “Move over, asshole,” he mumbled in a fake angry voice, bringing his feet up beside him after kicking his shoes to the floor, ready to slip them back on before they left. He watched Richie look at everyone else in exhaustion.

“You guys are too much. Take a page from my book, alright, there’s only three things you need to have fun: Me, Sonia Kaspbrak, and a box of condoms.”

Eddie groaned, lifting his leg to stretch it forward and shove his foot into Richie’s face. “Beep beep, Richie. Fucking disgusting.”

He shoved Eddie’s foot out of his face, frowning. “ _ Asshole. _ ”

“ _ Dickhead _ .”

“ _ Prick. _ ”

“ _ Shitass. _ ”

Eddie felt laughter bubbling up from his chest. Anyone could annoy Eddie, especially Richie. But the only one who could annoy Richie was Eddie. This made him feel special, that he and the other had a special connection because of that fact and many other things. He smiled in amusement, poking his cheek with his sock-clad foot again and again.

“Cut it out, you turd,” Richie complained, grabbing the boy’s squirming ankle to hold it away from his face.

“You know, Richie,” Stan began, obviously annoyed with the two of them constantly bickering. “You don’t  _ have _ to come with.” He was already finished packing things into his backpack, slinging it over his shoulder as he spoke.

“Sheesh, Staniel. Tell me how you really feel.” He placed a hand over his heart, feigning sorrow. “You know what? Maybe I will, seeing how  _ unwanted  _ I am,” he said, raising his voice slightly so the others could hear as well.

Beverly had apparently been listening in before he had grown louder, smirking as she started to speak. “You and Eddie still do have to fix the table.”

Eddie groaned at the mention of  _ the table _ . The five of their friends had started reminding them of it nonstop, always finding a way to bring it up to the two of them. They were supposed to fix it, Eddie already knew. It was all because of  _ Richie _ , though. A few weeks prior they had been rough-housing, like always, Richie accidentally kicking the leg out from under the table, hard enough that some of the wood had splintered and it came crashing to the ground of the clubhouse, the belongings that had rested upon it then strewn across the rug. He had done it whilst chasing Eddie, which he guessed was enough of an excuse to place the blame on both of them for the others.

“ _ Noooo _ ,” Richie whined. “Bev, what the fuck-”

“The-that’s a good idea,” Bill agreed, his full backpack hanging from his shoulders. “We do need it fixed, guys. You said you would do it.”

“How did I get roped into this?” Eddie hurriedly asked. “I’m not the one who wanted to stay in the first place.  _ And, _ I’m not the one who physically broke it.”

Richie gaped from the other side of the hammock. “No no no, Eds, we’re in this together-”

“Like hell we are!”

“Maybe I wouldn’t have been chasing you if you didn’t-”

“ _ Guys _ , It’s not that hard,” Ben told them, shrugging his shoulders. “Honestly, I could fix it if you want-”

“No!” Eddie exclaimed. “Ben, it’s Richie’s fault. You shouldn’t be cleaning up something _you_ didn’t break.”

Richie threw his hands up. “No, our fault _ ,  _ Eddie Spaghetti.  _ Our _ fault.”

“Don’t call me Eddie Spaghetti-”

This went on for a few minutes, their five friends trying to stop them from screaming their lungs out, eventually giving up because when Richie and Eddie got going, there was no rational way to get out of it. They had all started to leave, Mike telling them they should just quickly fix it and then head over to Ben’s house after they were finished. The two boys had heard his words, but then quickly went back to arguing, left alone together in the hammock of their clubhouse. Eventually, they had also both given up on placing the blame, both arriving in a wary silence. Richie had taken a comic book out of his backpack to read, so he didn’t have to look at the other.

Eddie felt anger burning in his chest, his arms crossed over the feeling. He was pouting, wanting Richie’s attention back on him. To be truthful, he liked when they fought. He had the other’s attention for the duration of it and he got to annoy him like no one else could. And it wasn’t like it was real. Afterward they always broke out into loud laughter and playful shoves. This time however, they were holding their ground. This made him antsy for them to make up.

Eddie raised his foot from where it had come to dangle off the side of the hammock, nudging Richie’s arm with it. He watched the back and front page of the comic covering his face for any type of movement, but there was none. Eddie gave a huff, giving him a harder poke. All Richie did in response was flip a page.

So, Eddie frowned, took his foot, and kicked the comic out of Richie’s hands and onto the floor with a slap.

“Dude!”

“You’re an ass,” Eddie said, face beginning to burn with embarrassment, thinking the other actually might be mad at him.

“Yeah, well you’re annoying,” Richie complained, adjusting his glasses.

Eddie let his frown deepen, tightening his crossed arms. He then kicked him again, this time in his face, softly nonetheless. Richie looked  _ angry _ , pushing him away and letting a noise out in frustration. He kept kicking though, almost knocking his glasses off in the process until he was stopped.

Richie had reached to tickle the bottom of his foot through his sock, holding it tightly with the other hand.

This caused Eddie to jerk his leg and try to pull his foot away, letting out a shriek of a laugh. “Richie!”

Richie finally cracked a wide smile of triumph, not letting up on tickling him. “That’s what you get,” he said, quickening his movements. He sat up, pulling on Eddie’s leg to slide him towards him, despite all the squirming. “That’s what you get!”

“Okay! Okay! Stop stop _stop_ _!_ ” he squealed, nearly shedding a tear with how hard he was laughing, desperately trying to break free from his grasp. 

“And why should I?” Richie asked, looking down at the other with complete adoration. He wore an amused smile, as if he were thinking about nothing else than the boy in front of him, nothing else more important to him in the moment. Richie had slowed down his tickling, still holding a firm grasp around his ankle with his long fingers. Eddie was on his back and he had slipped down to the middle of the hammock, his hair pressed to the fabric now a mess as he stared up at the other, his brown eyes shiny. His knees were bent and his free leg was around the other. One of Richie’s eyebrows twitched, seemingly coming up with an idea. He gripped his ankle with both hands until sliding one of them up, fingertips pushing under his sock and slipping it down his foot.

“What are you doing?” Eddie asked, interested in whatever shenanigans he had come up with. He cracked a smile and a huff of laughter in excited nervousness whilst Richie pulled his striped sock completely off and dropped it to the floor.

Richie broke into utter concentration, both his eyebrows pressing together under the frames of his glasses. He moved to hold his foot in his hands, his thumbs pressing into the arch of it. Out of nowhere, he ducked his head and licked a stripe up from his heel to his toes. Eddie jumped, giggling out, “What the hell!” He smiled even wider, cheeks red as he squinted his eyes. His heart had started pounding once again, just with the thought of Richie’s tongue doing anything to him. “Tozier, you have a foot fetish or something?”

Richie shook his head, but went forward again nonetheless to take his big toe into his mouth, starting to suck on it.

“Richie . . . what the fuck.” It felt strange and looked even stranger. Eddie couldn’t help thinking of how gross it was. Sure, he had taken a shower that morning and had always kept himself perfectly fresh on every part of his body, but they had been running around for a few hours and it was hot outside. And he thought that’s why he liked it, because it  _ was _ gross. His mother had been protecting him from germs his entire life, taking precautions to keep him constantly clean and always berating him to take them as well. So, he did, and he enjoyed doing it. Being clean was his normal, it made him comfortable. But, doing this with Richie, being  _ gross _ with him was good because of how uncomfortable it was. The two were far from normal. He understood this as he watched Richie savor the taste of his sweat, eyelids drooping low.

Eddie also began to wonder how it would feel to have his mouth in other places as well, places more germ-ridden than between his toes.

Richie pulled back, shaking his head once more. “I don’t have a foot fetish,” he assured him once again. “I think I just like how you taste.”

“ _ Yuck _ ,” Eddie softly moaned, seeing him slowly kiss down his ankle, tongue poking out every now and again to taste. He took both of Eddie’s legs and moved them to rest on his shoulders, pushing him forward a bit so he had enough room to turn and bend down to press kisses to his inner thighs. Eddie had never felt anything like it before, let alone fathomed it. There had been a few times he had imagined doing things with Richie, terrible unspeakable things, but he never thought for one second that it could actually be real.

Eddie’s gaze was stuck on him moving from his left thigh to his right to lick and taste there, his lips pressing softly into his flesh and getting dangerously close to the fabric of his shorts. Eddie had spread his knees apart farther, dropping them to press his heels on the edges of the hammock, trying to hint to him the bad idea that had come to mind, something he wanted to ask him for but was too embarrassed to do so by saying it out loud. Richie continued to suck on his soft skin, large hands sweeping over the expanse of the sections he wasn’t mouthing at. He was being too nice to him, too soft, it made Eddie want to blabber out quiet words of appreciation and jumbled sentences of sweetness.

Richie just kept kissing him, not catching on to any signs of the other wanting  _ something _ . He had though reached up to lightly press the palm of his hand against the bulge in Eddie’s shorts, making the small boy think that this would progress into what he wanted. Not that he didn’t want Richie to be doing what he was doing, just that he couldn’t stop jittering thinking of his mouth and he just wanted him too bad.

It came to a deafening halt after Richie had mumbled, “Shit, you do taste good,” while nuzzling his skin.

“ _ Fuck, Richie, can you just suck my fucking dick?!” _ he cried out angrily, before even thinking over his words in his haze of horniness.

Richie looked up in shock, mouth gaping and lips wet.

Eddie’s eyes sprung open, horrified with his own words.

_ Why the fuck did I say that? What is wrong with me? _

His question had broken him out of his daze and made him remember everything that had brought them to this point. Richie and Eddie were just friends. They were just helping each other out. With Eddie confessing a dangerously intimate thing that he wanted to do with the other, it had basically ruined that whole dynamic. If they were just having fun, then why did he want so much more? Why did he long for Richie in ways that he had never even comprehended with someone else?

He had to fix it, he had to tell him a lie. “Richie, I-”

But, Richie had quickly drowned out his words, pulling the boy’s shorts and underwear down in one fell swoop, then dropping down to take Eddie’s dick in his warm, wet mouth.

Eddie jolted to sit up, desperately letting out an, “ _ Oh God _ ,” letting his eyes roll back into his head as he threaded his fingers through the other’s hair. He shook in pleasure, added on to the fact that Richie had actually wanted to blow him, that he didn’t mind doing it. Apparently, he enjoyed it, because Eddie was amazed at how enthusiastically he went down on him. Richie had pressed the flat of the majority of his tongue against the side of his dick, his top lip pressing firmly as he bobbed up and down. “Richie,” he breathlessly said, confused as to why this was happening.

The other sank down all the way to the hilt, making Eddie fall back once again and press his hair into the hammock, his thin hips lifting up into the air as he shut his eyes and opened his mouth. Richie let out a gag when Eddie’s dick went a little too far, which made the short boy spring open his eyes and watch him with worry, yet he did not stop nor even slow down. Richie looked at him with utter dedication, only pulling off to tongue at his slit every now and again.

“Richie  _ Richie Richie Richie- _ ”

He had never been so loud when he was turned on before, it made his bright red face burn with guilt, but it didn’t seem to be a problem. It actually seemed like Richie admired it, every time Eddie let out a noise Richie would furrow his brows and if he was only jerking him, his mouth pressing kisses to his shaft, he would open his mouth like he was getting pleasured as well.

“ _ Fucking . . . Fuck!” _ his trembling voice uttered, turning his face to the side so he didn’t have to look at him making those too-much-to-handle faces. He could feel himself covered in saliva, dripping down his balls, and shivered. “I’m gonna come, Rich,” Eddie alerted him, so he could pull off in time.

The thing was though, he didn’t.

It forced Eddie to look back at him, repeating, “ _ Richie _ , I’m going to come.”

Richie tightened his grip, bobbing impossibly faster. So Eddie pressed the palm of his hand against the other’s forehead to push him away, making his tongue hanging slightly from his mouth and a small pop to sound. “ _ Eds, just let me swallow it _ ,” he croaked, glasses askew.

The thought made him tremble in place and all he could do was limply let his hand fall to the side to let Richie continue, all the while trying to come to terms with the fact that this was all actually happening and it wasn’t just another wet dream that he would wake up from, the front of his pajama pants wet. Eddie watched him take him into his mouth again and thought of the fact that it was Summer, that there were people running down the streets and having water fights, that their friends were all at Ben’s house watching movies, that the smell of the season was wafting in through the trapdoor to the clubhouse, and that they were both here, together, smelling of sweat and grass and each other.

And Eddie came with a smiling moan, feeling Richie lick every last bit up, swallowing every drop.

When he was finished he pulled Eddie’s underwear and shorts back up over his hips and slumped forward, pressing his cheek against the boy’s and wrapping his arms around him in a tired embrace.

“Don’t you want me to jerk you off?” Eddie had asked, not quite ready to do what the other had done just yet.

“You don’t have to,” Richie had told him, pressing his face into his neck. “I just want to hold you.”


	4. Getting Even

On a day where Eddie’s mother was gone on a visit to his aunt’s house, a day in which Richie would walk him home and spend a few hazy hours with him, he sat with his friends in the afternoon sun at the quarry. Mike and Bill both couldn’t make it that day, for reasons Eddie didn’t know. He looked around at the five of them, each splotched with the sun’s rays shining through the leaves on the trees. He frowned, missing their seven-membered unit as a rock song blasted through Richie’s lousy broken stereo.

It was that moment when Stanley had told them something that made his blood boil with anger and his hands to clench at his sides. “I’m getting a car,” he told them matter-of-factly, grinning and squinting through the Summer sun, the nostalgic smell of the lake wafting through the breeze.

“ _ What? _ ” Eddie nearly screeched, his lungs nearly stuttering and causing him to wheeze afterward.

“I’m getting a car,” he repeated, shrugging like it was nothing. Like everyone wasn’t growing up and leaving to never see each other again. Like Eddie and his friends didn’t even matter.

“You too?” Eddie asked, unable to hide the melancholy dripping from his words and seeping into the atmosphere of their conversation. He crossed his arms and leaned down against his thighs to hide his feelings.

“It’s just a car, Eddie,” he told him.

“No, it’s not- It’s- I-”

“Well, I think it’s cool, Stan,” Beverly said, leaning back. “Now I’ll have my own personal chauffeur to drive me around town any time I want.” She smirked and gave a laugh, Ben next to her frowning.

Stan got slightly red in the face, the corners of his mouth turning down before he said something that made Richie laugh, something that Eddie blocked out as he looked to the rippling water of the quarry. It soothingly jittered and shined, providing something for the boy to focus on and think through what he was feeling.

Shortly after this they had all decided to go home, whether it be because some of them had things to do or maybe because they were tired of Eddie, he didn’t know. But, Richie stuck close to his side as they walked, looking down at him with his excited eyes and wide smile, causing Eddie to take a breath and feel his stomach jolt in a sickly sweet way. No one else could be seen outside on his street, no one walking their dog or mowing their lawn. The two of them were completely alone except for the birds speaking in the trees. They headed up his driveway and into his home, wordlessly walking into his bedroom and shutting the door behind them. Richie set his stereo on the floor, watching Eddie slump down onto his bed with the tiredness of his younger self.

Richie came to sit beside him, Eddie surprised that he hadn’t tried to kiss him yet, knowing the tall boy must know something was wrong somehow. “How do you know that?” Eddie asked, tilting his chin towards him.

“Hmm?”

“How do you know something’s wrong?”

There was a long pause, long enough for them to settle into the silence. “How do you know I know?”

Eddie thought about this for a moment, coming to an understanding quickly. He sighed and fell against Richie’s shoulder afterward, shutting his eyes to rest them and swaying up and down as the other breathed. They stayed like that for a bit, Eddie unsure of what he was thinking, knowing the reason for his own silence but not the reason for Richie’s.

“You know, I . . . I didn’t want Mike to get a car,” Richie confessed quietly. “Or Stan.” He twisted his hands together in his lap. “I don’t know why. It’s just . . . _w_ _ eird .” _

Eddie blew a breath out in relief, pressing himself closer to his side. He moved to then press his forehead against his cheek, whispering, “Me too.” Eddie shifted to sit up straighter to kiss him on the mouth. Richie took no time to reciprocate, like he had been expecting it, hoping for it to replace his unease. It was a normal thing for them to do now,  _ be _ with each other. But, each time, Eddie had noticed, he was just as nervous as he was the first time they had done it. All fumbling hands and wavering eyes and especially red faces. He thought it might’ve gotten easier, maybe a little less surprising, but it didn’t. And he was glad for it, too. No matter how scared it made him, it also caused the boy to feel blissfully free in the moment.

And the way Richie explored him as if he had never seen the boy before was, well, it was always a welcome shock. As he lay back on his pillows, Richie’s hands traced over every part of him he could find, fingertips gliding over his jutting hip bones and his soft thighs. He took Eddie’s shirt off just to kiss him there, to trail his lips over his collarbones and across his nipples. He would tell him things, say things to him that Eddie would never expect to come out of his mouth in a million years. Things like, “You’re so pretty, Eds,” or, “You’re so cute, cutest person I’ve ever seen.” They were phrases that should be used for a girl, that should be used for Richie’s first girlfriend or something. But they were truthful to the touch, woven through Richie’s gestures with care, and Eddie couldn’t help but indulge in them, to repeat soft  _ thank you _ s in response.

Richie blew him patiently, like he had enjoyed the practice of it as much as the other. It was sweet and careful, sneaking a few glances at Eddie’s face whenever he could. Eddie still hadn’t brought himself to try and do the same to Richie, which didn’t seem to be a problem but still continued to make him feel guilty. Richie never even asked though, never even hinted towards the fact that he might want it. After Eddie had come he sat up and stuck his face into Richie’s neck as he gave him a handjob, putting everything into it as if to apologize to him about something he never even declined or was never even mentioned in the first place.

The week after that was unnerving as the boy wondered how he could bring it up to him, how he could tell Richie that he wanted to make him feel as good as he made him. It was difficult, not knowing if it was his place to do so. The pair had just gone with the flow of things, to spring the idea on him felt wrong to do. But, it almost felt right to do as well, seeing as they had always just done whatever they wanted, completely forgetting that they were supposed to only be doing this for fun and nothing was really supposed to  _ matter _ to the other. But, he felt like these experiences mattered to Richie and he knew that they wholeheartedly mattered to himself. So, Eddie was at a crossroads with himself, every night imagining being experienced in the ways he knew he never would be and blowing Richie in his kitchen, or at the quarry, or in the clubhouse.

On a Thursday, Eddie’s mother was out, going on her usual run to however many grocery stores her gas tank and bank account would allow, leaving Eddie home alone.

He had decided the night prior that this would be the time to finally do it, building up enough courage to allow himself to be okay with initiating it.

So, when Sonia Kaspbrak had left after giving him a repulsive kiss on the cheek, the first thing he did was head to the phone in his kitchen to quickly stamp Richie’s number into the dial. He waited nervously, repeatedly rocking on the balls of his feet to steady his mind.

Richie’s mother, Maggie Tozier, had answered, giving Eddie a sweet greeting that made his stomach queasy with shame. But, he wasn’t backing down just yet, blocking out his worries as Maggie called for Richie to come to the phone. “It’s Eddie!” she shouted.

Not even five seconds had passed before Richie's loud obnoxious voice came from the other end, making him jump in place. “Hey, Eddie Spaghetti!” 

He was overly excited in a way that made Eddie smile and press his nose into the phone as if he was trying to kiss him. “Hey, idiot,’ he responded, unable to hide the laugh that bubbled up. “Um . . . Hey, I was wondering if you wanted to come over? My mom’ll be gone for a couple hours, and I wanted . . . I just wanted to see you or something.”

“Well, sure, ‘course I would. Huh, I didn’t know you missed me so much, Spaghetti.”

“Beep beep, Richie. I do not,” he lied. They had just seen each other a few days prior, but he really did miss him.

“Uh-huh, sure. Keep telling yourself that.”

“Oh,  _ fuck off _ , you coming or not?”

“Yeah yeah, on my way.”

Afterward, Eddie sat in the living room and hugged the couch’s decorative pillow to his chest as he waited. He used it to try and calm his pounding heart, thinking over what he had thought to himself the night before. He had gone over the ways Richie had done  _ it _ to him, taken note of his technique. However, it was quite difficult to remember exactly what he had done, every time Eddie tried to focus on how he did it he was always lost in how it felt.

Richie was there too soon, rapidly knocking on his front door like someone had chased him there.

Eddie got up after replacing the pillow in its place, nearly stumbling over to the front door to open it, seeing Richie’s eager face on the other side. “Hey, Eds,” he greeted, his backpack slung over his shoulder.

They headed to his room like they usually did, Eddie’s hands shaking. Richie had pulled out his new tape player to show Eddie, telling him all about how it was the last one in the store and . . . And Eddie couldn’t pay attention to one word he was saying. Whenever they hung out now it wasn’t  _ all _ making out and touching each other, they also carried on reading comics and playing games, but this time Eddie couldn’t take it. He needed to just put his mind to what he wanted to do and do it.

So, as Richie went on, Eddie’s hands sprung forward to start unbuttoning the other’s jeans.

Richie was cut off mid-sentence, nearly choking in the process. “ _ Jesus- _ Eds- What- What are you doing?” He held his hands up, not having a clue as to what he should do.

Eddie’s small nimble fingers hurriedly worked to shakingly pop the button as he tried to stutter out a response. “I- I just- I want- Do you-” He couldn’t properly think, so he just spit out what he did know. “Richie, do you want me to blow you? Because, I- I could, you know, if you wanted me to.” He said this not as a question, but more as a minor thought from the back of his head because it followed it up with, “Sit on the bed, would you?”

Richie moved fast to do exactly that, kicking off his pants in the process. He was already getting hard at just the mention of it, Eddie could see the bulge protruding from his underwear. “You want to, Eds?” he asked, making sure. “I didn’t think you would- What about the germs?”

Yes, Eddie had thought about that. 

He had thought about it a lot.

How gross it was to suck your best friend’s dick.

“I want to,” Eddie breathed out, his face flushed and eyebrows furrowed. He went on his knees in front of him, Richie staring down into his eyes like he was amazed, setting his tape player beside him on the bed without looking at it. Eddie moved his brown eyes from his face down to between his legs, both of them moving to slowly shift his underwear down over his erection. 

Richie was bigger than Eddie and it wasn’t just because he was a bigger person, no. Eddie knew his friend’s member was bigger than normal for his size too. It was always a joke between them, Richie would boast about his package to his friends, making them roll their eyes in disbelief and disgust. Now, don’t get Eddie wrong, Richie wasn’t  _ huge _ . It wasn’t the type of thing you see in a porno or hear about through gossip. But, it was more than enough for Eddie to find endearing for some reason. Not endearing to belittle it, but to praise it. He reached forward to take it in his hand like how he usually did, the sound of his heart in his eardrums as he started to move his fist. There must’ve been something wrong with him with the thoughts that entered his mind then, he deemed. ‘Unnatural’ things that his mother wouldn’t approve of.

He wasn’t sure what to do next, so he started moving his head forward. Richie had brought his hand up to pet his hair, trailing his cool fingers down to soothe over the back of his neck, probably to calm him down. Eddie’s eyes fluttered at this before he slowed the movements of his hand and gave a small lick to the head of Richie’s cock. He had wiped the precum off of him, tasting it in his mouth before going in for another tiny lick. Eddie looked up at him worriedly, unable to do anything drastic out of fear. All Richie did was stare down in bliss and once in a while push Eddie’s hair that had fallen down away from his forehead so that he could see him. “Shit, Eddie. You look fucking cute.”

This boosted him to go further, tonguing the slit of his head before giving it a kiss and then finally taking it into his hot mouth. It was salty in the best ways, all Richie in its taste. He heard Richie give a firm groan in response. Eddie started to massage him with his mouth as his hands trembled, lips pressing here and there as he sank further down, using his tongue to travel around his shaft and to press against the head. Gathering some of the spit he had produced with his hand that gripped him, he used it to slick up Richie’s cock and jerk him off with it, whilst his mouth was softly working on him.

Richie winced in pleasure, seemingly trying to show him his gratefulness by petting his hair back with one hand and using his other to gently stroke the side of his face, his thumb sweeping over the space beneath the boy’s eye.

Eddie moaned when he couldn’t go any further, slightly upset with himself but turned on at the same time. His eyes burned and his throat spasmed, threatening to cause him to gag. This didn’t seem to bother Richie though, because Eddie decided to start to bob his head then, making the tall boy moan out into the humid air and to praise him. There was a wet noise that he hadn’t noticed before when Richie got him off and he liked it, he made a mental note to try and listen for it the next time Richie went down on him. Eddie shut his eyes tight, trying to speed his movements up, his hand reaching the length his mouth couldn’t. He breathed through his nose in long slow inhales and exhales.

“I’m about to come,” Richie told him, eyebrows pressed together and lips twisted down.

Eddie pulled off with a pop, gasping in a breath. “Where do you want to?” he asked, lips wet and shiny. He quirked an eyebrow, mindlessly moving his lips against the other’s shaft as he waited for an answer.

“ _ Fuck,  _ anywhere you want me to, Eds.”

Eddie thought of one place he  _ wanted it _ , but didn’t tell him, opting for a way he could find out how it tasted. He stared up at him before slowly poking his tongue out of his mouth, moving so the head of Richie’s dick rested there, precum leaking from the tip. He continued to jerk him off, working his wrist until it hurt. It didn’t take long for Richie’s mouth to open as he orgasmed, releasing his cum to gush into his mouth, dripping down Eddie’s tongue and down his throat.

Eddie sucked on the tip for a few moments, making sure nothing dripped onto the floor, surveying if he liked the way it tasted. Its flavor wasn’t like he expected, something awful and overpowering, in actuality it was slightly salty and dull, but good because it was Richie’s. He swallowed hard when it was over, sitting back to wipe his mouth with the back of his hand. “I . . .” His chest rose and fell rapidly, his eyes trained on the floor. He could partially see Richie pulling his underwear back up. “Was it okay?”

When no answer came he was forced to look back up at him.

Richie had a large smile stretched across his red face, one hand partially covering his mouth in a fist.

Eddie let out a laugh at his expression, saying, “Cut it out, you asshole!”

Richie laughed back, leaning down to grab Eddie’s wrists to pull him up onto the bed with him, wrapping his arms around the boy’s body to pull him close against his chest as he snickered into his ear. “Jesus fucking Christ, Eddie-Bear, I didn’t think you had it in ya.” His voice was sweet, it was obvious he couldn’t wipe the smile away.

“Shut up, Richie,” he responded, hiding his own smile against his shoulder, his forearms pressed to the other’s chest as he gripped the front of his shirt.

“You are literally the most adorable thing alive, do you know that? Like holy hell, Eds.”

“No I am  _ not _ ,” he said, covering his eyes by pressing them into the space between Richie’s neck and shoulder.

“Like, Jesus _fuck_ , I’m keeping you.”

“Whatever that means, you dickhead. Shut it.”

This didn’t stop Richie from pelting kisses all over his head and making him giggle until his chest ached, all up until they heard the front door being unlocked.

“Shit,” Eddie cursed. “My mom’s home.” He carefully slipped from Richie’s lap to stand on the floor, grabbing the jeans that lay there to throw them at the other. “Put these on, hurry. She must’ve decided to come home early for some reason.” They heard the sound of the door being opened and closed, his mother entering the house.

Eddie had gone to greet her, leaving Richie alone in his room. Apparently, Sonia had come home early because she had a bad encounter with some teenage hooligan who wouldn’t help carry her groceries out to her car (or something, Eddie didn’t pay much attention to her complaints anymore). She was so aggravated that she needed to sit down and watch television to relax, thankfully letting Eddie go back to his room after they put the groceries away. The entire time he couldn’t help acknowledging the fact that she had no idea that not even ten minutes before he had his best friend’s dick in his mouth. That he had done something that explicit to a  _ boy _ . It made him want to shout it in her face to spite her.

After they were done in the kitchen Eddie escaped into his room, locking the door after and spinning around to look at Richie.

He was still sitting on the bed, a pliant lazy smile on his face.

Eddie let the other kiss him but didn’t let it go any further, because they weren’t alone anymore. They had to be careful.

“Eddie,” Richie had whispered when he pulled away, both of them pressed together on the bed. He looked him in the eyes whilst he slowly moved his hand to the other’s hip. He looked nervous, arms stiff. “You didn’t get to come.”

Eddie nodded. “It’s okay,” he said, a little disappointedly.

Richie hummed in response, clearly wanting to say something. He didn’t however and moved forward to continue to kiss him, stopping the other from asking what was on his mind. They had started to do this after they had gotten each other off, making out. Eddie didn’t count this as just “having fun” or “helping each other out,” because it wasn’t that. It was something else entirely that he didn’t know what to call. Whatever it was, he pushed it aside, trying to be calm as Richie delicately pressed his fingers into his hips and softly dabbed kisses to his mouth. He pushed his fingers into the mess of Richie’s hair, wondering why he was being so gentle, so tender with him. He let it happen anyway, liking the way he was being so kindly treated. It was then as they were both slightly damp with sweat, the fan not doing much to cool off Eddie’s room but succeeding at letting out obnoxious squeaks whenever it turned, Richie started to slip his right hand down, fingertips pushing past the fabric of the back of Eddie’s shorts. The small germaphobe felt him push farther, middle finger pressing against his underwear until he found his entrance.

Eddie felt this all whilst he was unbreathing, all the way up until Richie pressed the pad of his finger against that place. He let out a shocked moan and pulled away, afraid, looking at Richie’s face. “Richie, my mom’s home. I . . . You can’t. We can’t . . . ,” he shook his head, “ _ do that _ .”

Richie had pulled his hand away almost immediately, embarrassed. “-Sorry, I’m sorry,” he blabbered out in a very un-Richie-like manner. “I should, um, I should probably get going.”

Eddie frowned. “Okay. Are you coming over tomorrow?”

“Uh- Yeah, obviously,” he responded quickly, eagerly getting off of the bed and packing up his things before he left out the window, leaving the other completely dumbfounded in his wake.


	5. The Closet

The following day was nerve-wracking for the boy, even more so when he heard the phone ring. He had been awake in his bed for hours in the nighttime heat before he had finally fallen asleep after their encounter the previous day. Richie was all he could think about, wondering if he had been too harsh with him. If not that, he wondered things about himself and he wasn’t sure if he liked the things he figured. 

His mother was sitting in her armchair when the phone started to blare, her hand out in front of her as she blew air against her pink freshly painted nails. Eddie had made a run for it when he heard the noise, jolting up and off of the couch to answer it. The cause of this being, he knew who was calling of course, and he didn’t want his mother to somehow find out any details of their agreement with each other. Sonia already hated Richie enough. She always had complained to Eddie that she smelled the stench of cigarettes on his breath and told him he was a bad influence, too wild and too outgoing for her poor fragile son. So, he thought it was best she didn’t even know who was on the phone in the first place, rather than being curious about what was going on between them. She would kill Eddie, Richie, and Mr. and Mrs. Tozier if she found out about that.

“Hey,” he hurriedly answered, voice down. “Where are you?”

“Yeah, about that,” Richie started. “Do you think you could come over to mine today? I wanna show you something.”

“Oh,” Eddie responded, lips parting in curiosity. “You do?”

“Yeah, is that alright?”

Eddie nodded. “Sure. I’ll be over in ten.”

“Cool.”

“Uh, bye.”

“Bye.”

Eddie hung up the phone, pressing the palm of his hand into the plastic handle for a moment as he paused in thought. He bit his lip, eyes motionless on the floor before he got going. He headed to his room and gathered up some of his things to stick in his backpack (bandages, inhaler, hand sanitizer, tissues, etc.) and then slung it over his shoulder, saying a quick goodbye to his mother and making a quick escape out of the house so she couldn’t stop him for whatever reason. He grabbed his bike from the garage and hopped on, riding it down his driveway and into the empty street.

Now, Eddie didn’t want to admit it, but he was getting more and more used to riding in Mike’s car. So much so that riding his bike felt . . . off. He missed it yes, the wind pushing his hair back and the way his calves burned from trying to pedal too hard too fast. But he had almost grown to like how a car ride made him feel, albeit, again, he would never admit it. It was slightly sad, how his bike felt only like a memory to him. Though, when he eventually arrived at Richie’s house, he dropped it in his front yard on the grass, he softly kicked it with his foot and smiled down at it before leaving to walk to the front door in acceptance.

Wentworth Tozier answered the door, greeting Eddie and inviting him inside before telling him the other boy was up in his room. Eddie stepped up the stairs, gripping his backpack straps as he abruptly remembered what had happened with Richie the day before. He squinted his eyes in embarrassment, a noise escaping the back of his throat in reaction. He wasn’t sure how to carry on from that, how to fix it. The night before whilst he was lying in bed was especially interesting, the boy somehow not being able to stop his mind (and hand) from wandering as he thought of what could’ve happened if he hadn’t stopped his best friend.

When he entered the room, Richie was standing at his dresser, fumbling through one of the drawers before stopping in his tracks like a deer in headlights when he saw Eddie. He was wearing a nicer shirt of his, one that was plain and dusty green, white stripes around the short sleeves, opposed to the Hawaiian shirts he usually wore. “Hey, Eddie Spaghetti,” he cheerfully said, trying to cover up how nervous he looked.

Eddie shut the door behind him and dropped his backpack to the floor before responding with, “Would you mind not calling me that for once? Jesus.”

“Yes. Yes, I would mind, very much.” He pushed his glasses up higher on his nose as they looked at each other for a moment of silence, an anxious breath being passed between them.

Eddie pressed his lips together, looking to the carpet awkwardly. “So . . . You wanted to show me something?” 

Richie reluctantly nodded. “Well, I- Yeah. But, um, it’s . . .” He pressed the palm of his hand to the back of his neck. His brown eyes flicked to the ceiling as he seemed to wince. “It’s fine if you think it’s stupid, because it  _ is _ , but I thought you might like it or something, I don’t know. So, don’t tool on me too hard for it, okay?” He led Eddie to the other side of his room.

This wall of Richie’s bedroom was made of two closets, each with a rickety sliding door. Richie stood in front of the one by his window and slid it open, looking away as Eddie took everything in.

The closet was somewhat large, plenty of room inside to store things in, a rack to hang clothing from. However, none of these items were present. The floor was covered in blankets and pillows, LED lights surprisingly hanging on strings on the walls to light the space up. It was warm looking, more comfortable than one could imagine. Eddie stared inside for a while, his eyebrows furrowed. He looked to Richie, whose face was a light shade of red. “What is this?”

Richie stuck his hands in his jean pockets and took a breath, not looking at the other. “Well, remember the one time where we made Ben sit in there for ten in minutes in the dark? For truth or dare? We could barely hear him. And yesterday, when . . . You know, when you said we couldn’t, um,  _ you know _ , because your mom was home. I thought that if I kind of made a place where we could be alone and not worry about someone finding us . . . Because, it locks from the inside, you know? And if someone walks in my room, they wouldn’t know we were inside. And, um, they would think I was at your house, or out somewhere or-”

He continued to blabber on as Eddie intently listened, staring at the side of his face. This was nothing like Richie. Richie was quick-witted and eager, laid back at times and excitable. Here he was shy and timid, yet still loud as if he was trying to drown out his own voice. He kept shutting his eyes like he was trying to hide, like he was pretending Eddie wasn’t there.

Eddie took everything in and looked down, a slow wide smile starting to crawl onto his warm face. “Oh,” he responded, quieting the other. He let out a soft laugh, seeing the other look at him from the corner of Eddie’s eye. He couldn’t help smiling so hard his teeth showed, turning to press the side of his face against Richie’s shoulder and looking the other way to hide it.

“What?”

“Nothing, you’re just . . . stupid.”

“ _ What? _ ” Richie repeated. “What does that mean?”

Eddie laughed and pulled away, smiling up at the other. “It means you’re  _ stupid _ , I dunno.”

Richie threw his hands up, slightly smiling in confused nervousness. “What are you talking about.”

Eddie huffed out a sigh, picking his foot up to softly stomp it into the carpet as he couldn’t keep eye contact with the other. He traced his eyes across the floor, chest aching as he tried to get out what he was trying to say whilst trying to say nothing at all. “It  _ means _ you did all this for  _ me _ and . . . And you’re a dumb stupid asshole, okay? You’re . . . You’re . . .  _ really fucking nice _ , okay?” He shook his head, pushing up on his toes to plant his mouth on the other’s in frustration, gripping the front of Richie’s shirt to pull him down.

Richie grabbed Eddie’s waist in surprise, making a small noise when they connected. After they had pulled away he bent down to rest his forehead on Eddie’s shoulder. He let out a smooth jittery laugh. “Come inside with me?”

Eddie breathed in through his nose, lungs stuttering as they expanded out of his anxiousness. “Where would I put my shoes?” he asked.

Richie looked up at him with a laugh. “Really, Eds? I’ve got it all covered. Hand ‘em over.”

So, Eddie slipped his shoes off and gave them to the other boy and watched as he stuck them up on the shelf above the clothing rack in the closet. Without another word he turned and grabbed Eddie by the elbows as he walked backward to pull him inside, sticking his head over the other's shoulder to close and lock the door behind them.

Richie slumped down to sit against the wall, pillows against his back and all around him. He stuck his hands out and looked up at Eddie with a large grin.

“You’re ridiculous,” Eddie told him, following suit. He let himself fall into Richie’s arms after he sat on his knees, both of them stretching out. It was unbelievably comfortable and warm. The boy found himself staring up at the lights through his eyelashes, a wave of pure hidden feelings washing over him and making his eyes prick with tears. He quickly shook the feeling away, getting most of it out with a small, “Thanks.”

Richie hummed in response, hand splayed over his back as his fingertips brushed over Eddie’s neck. “Sorry if it was weird yesterday, I just got a little carried away I guess,” he said honestly, in a tone that was meant to water down his words. “Friends don’t do that kind of thing.”

“And you think what we’ve been doing is friendly?” Eddie finally let out, voice so low even he could barely hear it. He swallowed, letting his head fully weigh on the side of the boy’s neck.

“Well, we’re just helping each other out. Aren’t we?”

The question was met with silence at first but was eventually answered with an unconvincing, “Duh.” He could hear the other breathing against the side of his head, short quiet breaths that sounded scared. “And yesterday was . . . I wasn’t- I’m not mad at you.”

“Okay.”

“Just, if my mom somehow caught us, Rich, I don’t know what would happen.”

Richie took a moment to think, slightly adjusting his position under him. “So . . . if she wasn’t there you would’ve let me . . . ?”

Eddie could hear Richie’s heart beating from his chest. Excited, nervous, afraid thumps that urged him to speak. He shut his eyes, trying not to make a single movement or noise, anything that could get him caught. Finally, he built enough courage to say it. “I’d let you do it to me right now if you wanted to,” Eddie whispered. He immediately bit the inside of his cheek hard enough to draw blood as he waited for a response.

Richie held him tighter, breath somewhat hitching. “What if I . . .” He didn’t continue, only moved to press a kiss to the side of Eddie’s neck, lingering there.

Eddie opened his eyes, moving them to look in his direction. “What if you what?” His stomach stirred with unexplored possibilities, open to just about anything the other wanted to give him. It made him sick with want, digging his teeth into his bottom lip.

Richie moved to kiss from his neck to his shoulder, shifting his shirt to the side to get there.

And, Eddie . . . Well, he  _ got it _ , then. Without any verbal cues, the boy understood what he wanted to do. In the hammock that day, what Richie had confessed to him popped into his mind. He let out a noise at the thoughts that entered his head, his member starting to awaken. “ _ Fucking hell, Richie _ , really? You’d do that? Are you serious?” It went against everything they had vaguely spoken about before, how they were just “helping each other out,” how “friends don’t do that kind of thing.” And he was glad it did.

“You’d let me do it? You’d want me to?”

Eddie nodded against his shoulder, squeaking out a, “Yes, please,” the shame burning in his chest being set aside for the moment because of the other’s eagerness.

Richie slowly flipped them over and kissed him languidly in the process. He started with his usual routine of kissing wherever he could reach, his neck and collarbones and shoulders, eventually slipping Eddie’s shirt off to expand the amount of skin he could get his mouth on.

Meanwhile, Eddie’s head was spinning as he pushed his underwear and shorts down his thighs, too eager to think. He kicked his clothes away to the other end of the closet. The space was just big enough for the both of them, just not long enough for Richie to completely stretch out in. Eddie liked the tight fit, how close it forced them to be. The blankets underneath him were cool, practically sizzling against his hot skin. He felt an overwhelming sense of gratitude for what the other boy had done, letting out a weary smile. It soon fell from his face though, realizing what they were doing, what it meant. It scared him to know that they both wanted just as much as the other, both boys shaking yet struck with  _ want _ . “Are you sure this is okay?” Eddie asked him, unsure of what Richie would think of him. “Am I . . .  _ gross? _ ”

Richie’s fingers were grazing the underside of his thighs, pushing them up as he scooted backward. “Eds, if you’re gross than I am,” he shakingly responded. 

Eddie had laid back against the pillows, swallowing hard. He looked at Richie looking at him, both flushed and shy. He glanced away, slowly bringing his knees up. “Just so you know, I’ve already taken two showers today.”

Richie let out a laugh. “Really? I’d’ve thought the number would’ve been higher.”

Eddie smiled and shook his head. “Shut up, Richie.”

Then, the pressure was back on. Richie had slipped down to kiss Eddie’s stomach and then thighs, pushing them far enough to wear his knees pressed against his chest. Eddie felt a burn in his hips but didn’t stop him, not at all bothered by the feeling. He timidly watched as the boy took his time, kissing him with care. He reached his dick, making Eddie nearly melt as he gave it a few pecks as well. He quickly carried on after, finally coming to where he needed to be.

Eddie clenched his eyes shut. He had never felt so vulnerable before, never so out in the open like this. He gripped one of the many blankets beneath him, trying to calm himself down. The air felt still, unmoving, no noise being emitted from anywhere. He felt a warm breath against his skin and froze, letting a trembling breath out. Eddie couldn’t help doubting that they should be doing this. Many thoughts formed in his mind that showed him what could happen, what people would think. But, these thoughts were quickly dispelled.

Richie lightly kissed his hole, sending goosebumps up his body and making the hair on his arms stand up. He opened his eyes to look down at him, the thought of what he looked like becoming too much for him not to see. Richie glanced up at him for a moment, adjusting the way he was positioned, and then went forward again, only this time he let his tongue peek out from between his lips.

“Holy shit,” Eddie whispered.

Richie’s eyebrows furrowed as his eyes seemed to light up. He pressed harder against him, his tongue fully being exposed to lick against his opening in a slow manner. He did it over and over and over, soaking the skin there with his saliva.

Eddie took in a sharp gasping breath, his hand flying up to cover his mouth. “ _ Richie,  _ that’s . . .”

“Fucking hell,” Richie practically moaned, shutting his eyes and tilted his head. He gave his entrance open-mouthed kisses, dropping his jaw and slipping his glasses off so he could make it even better. “Why do you taste so good?”

“ _ Oh, fuck, _ ” Eddie groaned in reaction, throwing his head back. He tried to pull his knees back even further. “That’s fucking  _ disgusting _ . You’re so  _ fucking gross _ ,” he moaned. “God,  _ Rich- _ ”

Richie practically shoved his face between his legs, licking up and down and across his hole. And all of a sudden, he was  _ inside of him _ . Eddie would’ve given a shout if he didn’t feel the wind get knocked out of him, a wave of pleasure rolling through his flesh. Richie’s tongue had breached his opening, licking inside and pressing against his walls as far as it could go, slipping from side to side.

Eddie felt himself go into autopilot, reaching down to grab the other’s hair to pull him harder against him, further inside of him. Richie seemed to like this idea, moaning and wrapping his arms around Eddie’s stomach, sitting up on his knees. He had bent the small boy’s lower half into the air and pressed his shoulders to the ground, pushing as hard as he could against him. The vibrating noises he let out made Eddie’s eyes roll into the back on his head, moving his hand to grip his dick. With two eager pumps he was coming with a loud gasp.

Richie kissed him through it, eventually setting Eddie back down to lie on his back. He replaced his glasses on his face, chest rising and falling as he wiped his mouth with the back of his hand. He gave a shy laugh, his eyes sweeping over Eddie’s body, the cum glazing his stomach. “You’ve never come that fast.”

Eddie covered his own eyes, letting out a strangled noise. “Beep beep, Richie. Shut up.” His face was radiating heat, warming his hand. “Do you want me to blow you now or not?”

Richie choked and let out a rough cough, nodding. “Uh- Yeah- Sure- Uh, yep.”

…

Afterward, they both had lied side by side, shoulders pressed together while they stared at the lights above them. 

Eddie had never felt as calm as he did then. And he couldn't even care less that it was humid, that they both were damp with sweat. He liked being in Richie’s company more than anything else.

“You know what?” Richie abruptly said.

Eddie turned his head to look at him, his cheek pressing against his shoulder. “Hmm?”

Richie looked at him, too, eyes wide and eyebrows raised, he had come up with an idea. “We should just get a car together,” he stated.

“We should?”

Richie nodded. He cast his eyes back up to the lights, letting them wander there. “Yeah. We should. We could, like, put our money together and save up. And then after senior year . . . we could just go. Fuck Derry.”

“Really?” He wanted to add on, to ask him if he was sure. If it was really Eddie he wanted to be going with. But, he couldn’t. He didn’t want to know if Richie had second-guesses.

“Yeah. You want to?” He looked down at him, eyes suddenly full of worry. “It’s okay if you don’t, I just figured-”

“Yes,” Eddie intervened. “Of course I want to.”

Richie smiled and looked away, a sight that made Eddie’s heart tremble. He adjusted his glasses on his face and pushed a hand through his hair. “We could-”

“We should have sex,” Eddie blurted out.

The other whipped his head back down to look at him, a noise escaping from the back of his throat. “You-” He stopped himself, growing redder in the face by the moment.

Now, it was Eddie’s turn to look away, his chest threatening to implode with how rapidly his heart was beating.  _ Why did I say that? What’s wrong with me? This wasn’t the deal! Eddie, you’re such a freaking dumbass!  _ “Nevermind,” he whispered, acting as if he had said nothing at all or something else entirely. He picked at a thread that hung from his shorts in silence.

“I- You- We-.” Richie was having a hard job formulating a sentence in the meantime, stuttering out short phrases that made no sense.

“I said nevermind, okay?” Eddie flipped over on his side to face the door, his arms crossed in front of him. He wanted to leave, or cry. Or both.

But, Richie kept talking, as always. “You . . . Do you- Sorry, you want to do  _ what _ ?”

“ _ Nothing _ , Richie! Just,” he pressed his face into one of the pillows, causing his voice to be muffled, “shut the fuck up.”

“But, you don’t even . . . You want me to-”

Eddie pressed his hand over his ear, clenching his jaw and closing his eyes.  _ Don’t cry don’t cry don’t cry don’t cry don’t cry-  _ His hand was removed though, Richie prying it off to hold in his own.

“Seriously?” he asked. “Because, if you want to, I'd . . . I wouldn’t mind.”

Eddie flipped over, eyes glassy and face warm. “You  _ wouldn’t mind _ or you’d want to?” he asked, voice angered. He couldn’t meet his eyes nor get control over his breathing.

Richie took a pause, running his fingers over Eddie’s knuckles absentmindedly. “I mean . . .” He nodded to himself. “Yeah, I want to . . . I  _ really _ want to, actually,” he said, voice quiet.

Eddie looked at him.

“I . . . I, um, have thought about it,” Richie told him. “I mean . . . Fuck Derry, right?”

Eddie watched him carefully, a small smile starting to appear on his own face as he suddenly felt the need to wrap his arms around the other in a tight embrace, one where he never let him go. He rubbed his eyes with his free hand. 

“Yeah. Fuck Derry.”


	6. Change

Eddie knew how two boys had sex, of course. He had heard through gossip and through television comedies, even through his mother, albeit her two cents on it was a lot more judgemental and angry than most, taking the side of the people who had bullied Eddie and his friends in school. He only vaguely knew the details of how to prepare for this situation, Richie being the one who had to fill him in on exactly what they had to do because Richie always seemed to know more about sex than any sane person he knew. They had planned it a week prior, both of them quite embarrassed and red-faced, but still set on doing it.

The week before was nothing less than strange. Not in a bad way, though.

The day was coming up and they were both nervous, each boy fantasizing about what it would be like and cringing at what they themselves could completely mess up in the moment. Every time he saw Richie he was struck with anxiety, wondering if they should really be going through with this. What would it mean for them, as friends? And what would it mean for Eddie?

The date that they had agreed upon was July twenty-seventh (a day where Richie’s parents were set to drive on a trip for a few days). A week before, on July twentieth, the boys were walking the streets of Derry, each with an ice cream cone in hand. Their friends were each doing their own thing, Mike and Stan probably out driving somewhere. Richie and Eddie had been to the arcade and then the pharmacy and then they had gotten ice cream from the stand that was sat near the center of town, surrounded by busy shops and diners. They were laughing as they went, swerving in between all of the other folks who were out and about.

Richie had a long smile on his face as he looked down at the other, watching Eddie laugh at an incredibly stupid joke he had told. His black bangs hung against his forehead, being parted because of the breeze. Eddie couldn’t help but appreciate his appearance now, for one reason or another. He had always pushed those thoughts away when he was younger, but now it seemed like it didn’t matter seeing as they had grown closer in a way this Summer. So, he took it all in. Richie’s smile and his laugh, his gangly arms flailing as he spoke, his eyes that never parted away from Eddie once. Eddie fought the urge to reach out and hold his hand, an urge that scared him enough to make his stomach drop, allowing him to remember where they were.

After the day out they headed to Eddie’s home, both in good spirits. Eddie’s mother was there, her eyes boring into Richie from the living room as the two of them raced through the house to the boy’s bedroom, laughing and giggling. And as they got there, Richie did in fact grab his hand. As he shut the door, Eddie held him back, breathing in the feeling of it and smiling wider. 

They spent the day listening to music and just talking, which made Eddie unbelievably happy. They had always hung out since they were young, the two of them alone. And even though things had changed between them, they still enjoyed each other’s company. Eddie even thought that since everything had happened, they had changed for the better. Like there wasn’t anything holding them back. Mostly. There was still something he couldn’t put his finger on that he needed to figure out, though. It was something that still made him nervous and antsy when he looked at Richie. What was it?

Nevertheless, the day was great. He had even convinced his mother to let Richie spend the night.

Richie was on the floor beside the bed in a sleeping bag, the room dark and the door locked. Neither of them were asleep, minds too busy to get any rest. Eddie faced the edge of the bed, seeing only Richie’s shoulder as he lay there. Eddie had kicked his blanket down the mattress, an annoying humidity filling the room. He had turned his fan on, yet it wasn’t doing much so far. The friends were whispering to each other, their hushed voices not even coming close to waking a sleeping Sonia in the next room over. “What do you mean?” Eddie quietly asked, his face donning a permanent smile as his eyes wandered the room.

“I  _ mean _ , Bev is definitely in love with him. Haven’t you seen her around him?”

He gave a chuckle. “Well, yeah. But, I don’t know . . . I guess, it’s almost like she doesn’t even know it herself,” Eddie responded. He moved to peer over the edge of the mattress, fingers lingering against the fabric.

Richie’s eyes were already set there, grinning wildly when Eddie had come into frame. 

He looked down at him, giving a frown back. They couldn’t do anything here, anything too explicit. But, to be honest, Eddie didn’t want to at the moment. He reached his hand down, gesturing for Richie to come up with him. So, Richie did, looking pleasantly surprised by this. The small boy scooted back and flipped over, facing the wall. He felt the bed dip, his body slightly wavering as the other got in behind him. Then, he had settled, his breath against the back of Eddie’s neck.

“Uh, what do you want me to do here, Eds?”

Eddie let out a grumble and flipped back over, his eyebrows curved downwards. There wasn’t much room, their noses an inch or two apart. “Well, I  _ wanted  _ you to, like,” he pressed his face into the pillow and shut his eyes in embarrassment. “ _ Cuddle _ me, but I guess you’re too stupid to-”

Richie let out a noise that was half of a cough and half of a laugh. “You- You want me to cuddle you?” He reached a hand out to prod at his side.

He groaned. “Well, not anymore,” he said, slapping Richie’s hand away.

The tall boy didn’t relent, though, laughing as he tried to snake his arm around the other, only to be pushed away. Eddie had started to laugh too, both shoving at each other. “ _ Okay _ , okay,” Richie nearly whined. “Let me cuddle you!”

Eddie tried to pout at that, but failed and let a smile show through. “Shut up,” he whispered.

“You’re the one who wanted me to!” he complained.

Eddie flipped back over. “Hurry up then. Or I’m sending you back to the floor.” 

He felt the bed slightly shake, Richie getting closer and letting his arm drape over Eddie’s small torso, breathing out a sigh into his hair. His front pressed against his back, warm but not annoying in the slightest. Then, as usual, Richie had started to whisper sweet things to him, pressing his mouth into his hair and against his ear and cheek. “No, you wouldn’t,” he quietly said.

“Yes, I would,” Eddie lied.

“Nope,” Richie disagreed, pulling him closer. He placed a kiss on his eye, which had shut peacefully. “You’re very pretty, you know that?” Richie barely said, his voice rivaling a whisper with how quiet it was. He sounded like he was on autopilot, saying things he never would in front of their friends. He would never be able to say these things to his face either. “You’re very cute.  _ Cute, cute, cute,  _ Eddie. The cutest.  _ Jesus _ , have you seen yourself?” He kissed his hairline with such a delicate touch it made Eddie want to cry. Richie slumped forward a bit, moving until he could kiss his mouth. Eddie kissed back, turning so he could also wrap his arms around the other with a sigh. It wasn’t long before they fell asleep, tangled together like that.

…

When Eddie awoke, it was not morning. In fact, it was hours into the night, the moon shining through the curtains. He squinted at the white wall, confused for a moment at why he was suddenly conscious. Then, he felt it, the subtle movements behind him. “Richie?” he quietly spoke. Eddie slowly turned so his chest was against the bed, moving his head carefully to look at the other boy without disturbing him, mindful of the arm still thrown over his waist. Richie was still asleep, yet his eyebrows were furrowed. Eddie tracked his eyes down, realizing what was wrong. Richie was hard in his pajama pants and was probably rutting against the other whilst they slept. Eddie made a noise of acknowledgment, heat spreading across his face. 

He thought of what was to be happening the following week, looking back up at Richie’s face. He had no idea how it would go and could only predict the worst. However, at the moment, he felt his eyelids flutter and stomach stir at the thought of Richie being inside of him. He hadn’t even noticed his hand had trailed down the other’s chest to his hard-on, palming it through the fabric. He was hot from the deep sleep he was in, yet he couldn’t care less. Maybe he could break his own rule about his mother being home, just this once. The door _was_ locked. Flooded with curiosity, he turned back over, pressing his back to Richie’s front once more. He had forgotten what it had felt like the first time. In Mike’s car, Eddie sat in Richie’s lap as the vehicle went over bumps. He tried to not enjoy it at that time, but now, he couldn’t believe how he didn’t completely give in.

Eddie pressed his ass against the tent in his pants, his small hips working in circles to try and receive the friction he wanted. He sank his teeth into his lips as he moved, shoving his hand down to grab at himself. It wasn’t long before he found a nice rhythm, breathing hard through his nose as he carried it out. 

And it also wasn’t very long before Richie woke up.

The first thing he let out was a sleepy, “ _ Eds? _ ” Then, after a few moments when he realized what was going on, a, “Holy  _ fuck _ .”

Eddie gave out a frustrated moan, covering his face with one hand. “Help me- Just- Help me out, would you?”

Richie let out a shocked noise from the back of his throat, still laced with sleep. The tiredness soon slipped away, after he had grabbed Eddie’s hip and gave a hard thrust to his backside, causing the other boy to let out a gasp. He could feel Richie’s forehead resting on the back of his head as he ground against him, saying, “Jesus Christ, Eddie.”

And, he couldn’t help saying it, it was the only thing he could think about. “Maybe this is what it’ll be like when we’re fucking,” Eddie sighed, pressing back harder, moving his hips in time with Richie as they squirmed.

This statement made Richie moan into his hair, reaching down to press his hand against the crotch of Eddie’s shorts as he moved his hips. This didn’t last long, between their pants and thrusts, both of them were too pent up to not let go this early. It was a sweaty humid mess after they had both come, Richie flopping onto his back with a slight gasp, pushing his hair away from his forehead. “What a way to wake a guy up.”

Eddie flipped to lie on his back as well, watching the ceiling. “Shit,” Eddie cursed, feeling the mess in his shorts. “You were hard first,” he said, breathing harshly.

“Well, thank God for wet dreams, I guess.”

They had rested there for who knows how long, both staring and breathing up at the ceiling. Richie spoke first, eyes not wavering. “Are you scared?” he asked.

“Of what?”

“Next week.” 

He turned to look at the side of Richie’s face. His hair was a mess, but he still looked as he usually did, beautifully handsome. “Yes,” Eddie whispered, making the other look him in the eyes. “But, I want to do it.”

Richie’s expression was unreadable, silent and soft. He gave a curt nod. “Me too.”

…

Richie’s parents had left for their trip early, giving the boys plenty of time together. Eddie showed up an hour later, slightly late because he couldn’t stop worrying about everything. 

Richie’s bedroom was filled with heat, even if the window was slightly slid open, rays from the sun shooting through the curtains across the floor and bed. It was slightly tidied up, more so than usual. No clothes were on the floor, yet the desk was cluttered and clothing hung from the drawers of his dresser like they were trying to escape the tight space. The bed was perfectly made, a sight which made Eddie gulp.

Richie looked nice, his hair washed and fluffy. He couldn’t keep his thin hands away from his face, either pushing up his glasses or pushing his fingers through his hair anxiously. He didn’t look at Eddie, nor did Eddie look at Richie for more than a quick glance. His stomach hurt with dread, his hands shaking. How do you even start a thing like this? He finally caught Richie’s eye beside him, neither one of them wanting to speak in case they said something stupid. “So . . . how do we . . .”

Richie bit his lip absentmindedly. “Maybe we . . .” He shook his head, clenching his eyes shut. “I don’t have a clue.”

Eddie gave the bed one last look, trying to keep his eyes away from it so he wasn’t so scared. But, it only made him look at the bottle of lube on the bedside table, which really didn’t help any either. He wished it had still been nauseously fun like the time in the hammock. When it was all laughing and no scary silent moments like this one.  _ It’s because of- _ The reason for it was still hidden in his mind, the thing that had started to hold him back. He desperately tried to grasp at it, to reveal what it was to himself, but he just couldn’t.

Eddie suddenly got angry. If he wanted it to be like the time in the hammock, then he would make it like the time in the hammock.

“Richie, let’s just-” He took a deep breath to calm his voice, he wasn’t mad at Richie, it was whatever-the-fuck he couldn’t figure out that was making him so pissed, the fact that he couldn’t take in air without his lungs stuttering. So, he did what he did best, he started to annoy Richie with everything he had. “You’re  _ annoying _ ,” he told him, crossing his arms over his chest.

Richie looked into his eyes, a brow raised. “What?”

“You heard me.  _ Dickhead _ .”

“Eds-”

Eddie gave a kick to his shin. “And- And Eddie Spaghetti is a stupid nickname, and  _ you’re  _ stupid _ , _ and you act like you’re so tough on the outside but in reality, you’re just as shy as the rest of us-”

Richie abruptly stepped forward, leaning down as he grabbed Eddie’s face to plant a kiss on his mouth and cut him off.

Eddie kissed him back, a wave of relief washing over him as he felt his chest swell with unsaid words. When Richie pulled away, he didn’t go too far, keeping their faces close. He looked flooded with nervousness, but sure in his own thoughts. “Don’t,” Richie told him. “You don’t have to do that, Eddie. It’s okay. We can be adults together, you know? I  _ want  _ to be one with you. I promise, you can trust me.”

He had seen right through him, through every little trick he had up his sleeve. There was no more time to act like a kid. No, what they were doing was changing into something else. They were leaving the past behind. Eddie couldn’t deflect it anymore, he knew. Richie hadn’t even made a single joke when he was there, probably to show Eddie that he was serious about this. It was Eddie’s mistake that he thought Richie was doing this for fun, that he was just using him to have ‘fun.’ He wouldn’t ever doubt him in that way again.

Eddie nodded, holding back his emotions. “Okay, Rich. I trust you.”

“ _ Fuck _ , I’m anxious, too. Look.” Richie dropped his hands to float out in front of him, showing off how they tried to be still but failed, twitching eagerly in the air. He let out a humorless laugh at himself.

Eddie figured it was time to push away his bashfulness, even if it was still hard for him to get out some of the right words. “Me too,” he responded, lifting his hands to match them with Richie’s.

Richie smiled, his eyebrows looking curved and pressed together as if he were about to call him cute. But, instead, he methodically moved forward again, pushing their hands away to kiss Eddie hard, pouring everything he could into it. The two thin teens looked odd standing there together, awkward and red-faced, but there was something right about it, something ever-lasting and wholesome.

Between kisses, Eddie got out, “Let’s just take our clothes off, ‘kay?”

Eddie watched in flashes, his polo shirt being slipped off of him and blocking his vision for a moment. Then, Richie’s Hawaiian shirt and undershirt. Their shorts dropping to the ground, a button clinking against the hardwood floor. Richie’s fingertips were then cool against his sides, leading him to sit on the bed. Eddie was confused when he pulled away, squinting his eyes whilst watching Richie pick something up from the floor.

He was smiling innocently, showing his red and yellow Hawaiian shirt to him. “Wear this for me maybe?”

Eddie grimaced. “ _ Why? _ ”

Richie snickered as he came to sit on the bed with him. “‘Cause I think you’ll look cute in it,” he answered honestly.

Eddie reluctantly took it from him, slipping it over his bare shoulders. It was big on him, the sleeves reached his elbows and the rest of the shirt hanging slightly below his waist. The front hung open, showing his chest and bare stomach. Suddenly, Richie had jumped forward, wrapping his arms around him and pressing his face into his neck to knock him on his back, the boy on top of him.

Eddie let out loud laughter, reveling in the feeling of their hot skin pressed together. “What’s wrong with you,” he giggled out, blushing, Richie pecking his neck over and over so quickly it tickled.

“You look good,” he smiled into his skin. 

Eddie’s heart was thumping erratically, wanting to squeeze out from under him because their touch was almost too much. He watched as Richie sat up, leaving the boy splayed out in front of him. Richie was flushed to his ears, eyes wandering over the tanned skin in front of him. His fingertips danced to his underwear, carefully sliding them off as Eddie lifted his hips to help. He was hard, his dick leaking precum. The goosebumps that spread across his flesh were countless when the tall boy swept his hands over his thighs. The rays of the sun that came through the curtains were across his face and chest as he lay there, shining a spotlight on him. And all he wanted to do was reach out and touch Richie above him.

“Richie,” he softly said.

He was still entranced with the view in front of him, his brown eyes tracing his hip bones. “Hmm?”

“Let’s cuddle, yeah?”

He could visibly see Richie swoon before his eyes, his red lips parting in a way that made him look like he was in awe. He didn’t take his time, leaning down to take Eddie in his arms and pull him up, into his lap. Eddie hung his head over his shoulder, splaying his hands over Richie’s shoulder blades and shutting his eyes. He could finally feel the breeze coming from the window, sweeping over his face and cooling his blush. Their hearts beat against each other at a rapid pace, he couldn’t really tell which thump was from who anymore. Richie had pressed his nose into his sun-kissed shoulder, kissing him as if to tell him something. Eddie was already hard, rocking his hips gently against the bulge in the other’s underwear, pressing his dick there. He didn’t mean it to be sexual, and it wasn’t. It was more so a gesture of affection. He knew Richie got it from his response, the lanky boy hugging him harder against his chest and rocking back, giving a small wet kiss in between Eddie’s neck and shoulder. 

Eddie pulled back just enough to look him in the eyes, pushing his small fingers up and into the base of the other’s black curly hair. “Hey,” he said softly. The look in Richie’s eyes was strong, almost too much for him to cope with the blossoming feelings in his chest. He felt his fingers pet over his lower back, underneath the Hawaiian shirt, as he continued, “Do you want me to suck you off?”

It was obvious Richie couldn’t help the corners of his mouth from twitching up, like even hearing Eddie say those words were so preposterous he couldn’t believe it. “I’ll come too fast,” he told him, “We won’t be able to, you know.”

Eddie nodded, tilting his head a bit to the side. “Yeah, but . . .” His eyes trailed to the light blue wall, organizing his thoughts. “We can just wait a little while and then you could do it again.” At his own words he gave a mischievous smile, ducking his head and giving a small laugh.

Richie let a smooth laugh fall from between his lips, surprised and turned on and shocked. “ _ Jesus _ , Eds.” He pressed his cheek to the side of his head, seemingly trying to get closer to him. “You want this to go all day or something?” he joked, like it was implausible.

Eddie, however, found it very plausible. Maybe not  _ all day _ , but, he couldn’t help that curious feeling from inching its way through his head and his stomach, making him tingle all over, sending goosebumps across his flesh in the humid air. “A little while at least. And . . .” Other thoughts raced through his mind, his heart dropping in a good way, his eyes blowing wide. “We could . . .”

“What?”

“Just, it’ll be good,” Eddie stated, obviously trying to divert away from the subject.

However, Richie was never one to leave a situation on hold. He leaned all the way forward to press Eddie’s back into the bed, then pulled away from him to look at his face, observing his features to try and figure out what he was going to say. “What?” he said once more. “Just tell me. I really want to know,” he said truthfully, voice antsy and curious.

Eddie gulped, this wasn’t something he had ever told him out loud, to his face. His face and chest burned with the red that flooded there, gulping nearly audibly. “Just . . . if we do stuff for a while . . . since it’s hot in here and . . . we-”

_ “Oh,”  _ Richie breathed out, jaw lowering.

“You don’t even know what I was going to say.”

“We’ll be all sweaty,” Richie clearly stated, like he had just looked inside of Eddie’s head to read his thoughts.

Eddie covered his eyes with his hands, letting out a noise.  _ How in the hell does he know? This is so fucking embarrassing. _ “I- You- No, that’s-  _ Ugh _ , Rich.”

“What, did you think I didn’t know you had a thing for gross stuff?” he asked softly, squinting his eyes in a way that was endearing. “I mean, it’s kind of obvious. Whenever I do anything like that, you always tell me how gross it is, I kind of just figured . . .” He slightly shrugged in explanation. 

Eddie’s mother had always told him to be clean. She told him never to play in streams or pick up bugs. It was the sole reason why he was a germaphobe and a hypochondriac, because she had made him fear almost everything in life so much it made him panic. He guessed that’s why he liked it so much, the fact that he was doing something so dirty and she didn’t even know. It made him feel in control. And most of all, it made him feel like Richie got him in ways no one else didn’t. Apparently, he was completely right. “Is it weird?” he asked, just like he had done when they had first gone into Richie’s closet. He slipped his hands away from his face to finally look at him.

Richie immediately shook his head, giving an odd smile. “ _ No _ . ‘Course not, Eds.” His normal bouncy voice was seeping through, Eddie could tell. He smiled at it, felt his chest tighten. “It’s kind of perfect, because . . .” His eyes drifted away from him, absentmindedly giving a shy grin. “I like being gross with you, too, like . . .” He lifted his hands in the air as he thought.

Eddie felt his stomach drop with anticipation, his smile falling, knowing exactly where he was going. “You like the way I taste,” Eddie nearly wheezed out, his body slightly shuddering.

Richie didn’t look at him, only smiled wider in embarrassment. “I don’t know why,” he told Eddie. “I like . . . doing things to you, things that make you feel good. It makes  _ me _ feel good.”

Eddie gave a small nod, throat clenching. “ _ Fucking hell, Richie _ . Please, let’s just do this, I can’t take it-” 

He wasn’t able to finish his thought, Richie ducking down to connect their lips in a pent up kiss, their breath hot through their nostrils. Eddie groaned against his mouth, arms coming up to wrap around the other’s shoulders as he was pressed into the bed. He felt good in Richie’s shirt, the loose fabric hanging from his thin arms and making him feel that he looked nice. This gave him a boost of confidence, causing him to lift his hips to rub his hard-on against the other boy’s.

Richie reciprocated easily, dropping down so it’d be easy to rut against him and apply more friction. Eddie made a noise, squirming slightly before racing down with one hand to push at the tall boy’s underwear. “Take- Take these off.”

So, Richie did. He moved to sit back and strip off the last remaining piece of clothing that he wore, both of them now naked, their skin tingling when pressed together. Eddie had gotten up on his knees, too eager to wait for him to come back down. He quickly pulled them together, sweetly kissing Richie with vigor. “C’mon, let me blow you now,” he said after pulling away. He didn’t know what was making him this way. His head was dizzy, fingertips stinging, and all he could think to do to ease it was to let it all out in a haze of pleasure.

“Yeah, okay,” Richie softly responded, turning so he could lie on his back, his head resting on his pillow. His lips were already parted in anticipation, eyelids low.

Eddie scooted back, breathing hard and swallowing as he got into position on his stomach, between the boy’s legs. He had blown Richie a few times since the day in his bedroom, feeling as though he knew what he was doing now. Yet, every time he was still a little intimidated by the thought of it. Richie, watching his every move, counting on him to make him feel good.

This time, Eddie shook it from his head. He moved his chin forward to greedily take the head of Richie’s cock in his mouth, the taste nostalgic to him now. Richie gave a moan, biting his lip and pushing Eddie’s hair back. Eddie grabbed its base, shutting his eyes for a moment as he gave a few bobs. He pulled back to give multiple long licks up his shaft and through the slit, peeking through his eyelashes to Richie’s eyes.

“Jesus, fuck,  _ Eddie. _ ”

He wasn’t experienced at all, neither was he good at it, yet the boy praised him highly for his work, reacting as if it was the first time.

“You’re too pretty,” Richie groaned. “God, you’re so pretty.”

Eddie hummed against his dick, pressing his eyebrows together at his kind words as he tried to go down further, sucking as he went. He shut his eyes once again, loudly breathing through his nose. The boy’s throat burned and tensed, but he didn’t pay it any mind. All he could think of at the moment was,  _ This is going to be in me soon. _ His eyes felt hot, tears building. Richie’s hips stuttered up, Eddie choking on it with a gag and pulling off to gasp in a breath. “ _ Fuck _ ,” he cursed with his now-rough voice, spit dripping from his lips. He pumped his dick earnestly, shivering from the way it looked.

“Eds, get on me,” Richie brokenly said.

Eddie wasn’t quite sure what he meant, looking to the other boy with questioning eyes.

“ _ Ah _ , shit, put your legs up here- fuck!” Richie blabbered out, unable to calmly get out what he was trying to say as the other continued to jerk him off.

Eddie realized what he wanted then, his stomach flipping at the thought. He let go of him for a moment, Richie sighing out as he did so, spinning around to put his right knee over the boy’s stomach. He looked over his shoulder into Richie’s eyes as he backed up, blushing as he got closer. He stopped when his ass was hovering over his face, Richie’s dick in front of him once again. 

“ _ Fuck _ , Eddie,” Richie started.

Eddie listened as he continued speaking, grabbing his cock in his hand to softly pump it. Staring at the small amount of precum that gushed from it and ran down the length.

“Every time we went swimming at the quarry I couldn’t keep my eyes offa you,” he said, truthful and vulnerable in his tone. “Your little hips and . . . “ Richie swept his hand up to where the curve of his ass started, making more goosebumps flood Eddie’s skin. “ _ God _ , sorry if this is weird for you, but, your shorts were so short, how couldn’t I look?”

Eddie dropped his head, hiding even though he couldn’t be seen in the first place. He was completely exposed in front of the other, and the things he was saying, he couldn’t take it. The thing he couldn’t put his finger on before was becoming more prevalent to him now. “I stared at you, too, you know?”

Richie was silent for a short moment, hips jumping when Eddie’s fist tightened a bit. “Why?” he asked.

He was shocked at how clueless he sounded, how much he didn’t understand that someone could be attracted to him. Eddie leaned down to give a loving kiss to his shaft to try and quell his fears, his own chest filled with sadness. “Because you’re . . . you’re  _ you _ .” Did Richie not notice how his shoulders had broadened over the past year? Or his wide and distracting smile? Eddie couldn’t lie, he had definitely not kept his eyes to himself whenever they and their friends swam at the quarry. No one at school at labeled Richie as the attractive type, which pissed Eddie off more than anyone. Richie had seemed to come to terms with it, but not the short boy. Eddie spent most of the past Summers nearly drooling over him and he didn’t understand why others didn’t either. “I like the way you look,” Eddie simply said.

“You do?”

Eddie nodded. “Well, yeah. I think you’re . . .” He was embarrassed to say it, but he wanted Richie to know. “I think you’re really good looking, Rich. And- And I’m not even just saying that, okay? I really do.” he frowned at himself, huffing out a sigh before just saying  _ fuck it _ and taking Richie back into his mouth.

Richie gasped behind him, hissing after.

Eddie would show him how much he found him attractive.

After a few bobs, he felt soft kisses being pressed to his thighs and he couldn’t help but to push his ass backward in an attempt to get him to go higher. He heard him moan at this, at his eagerness, before following his movements and sucking wet open-mouthed kisses to his ass cheeks, his hands on either side of them and starting to spread them.

Eddie let out an embarrassingly-loud moan at that, the fact that his knees were already so far apart and Richie just had to spread him even wider. Eddie had started tonguing his slit before pushing his knees even farther apart, eyebrows furrowing at his own actions. He felt Richie’s thumbs press on either side of his hole before one had dragged over it, lightly sweeping over the ring of muscles a few times.

Eddie still wanted to give Richie everything he had, abruptly trying to take in as much of his cock as he could, his throat starting to burn again. He made a gagging noise but clenched his eyes shut, staying there.

“ _ Fucking hell _ ,” Richie let out, before pressing the flat of his tongue over his asshole and dragging it over the opening.

Eddie came back up, breathing heavily and cursing at the feeling. For whatever reason, he went right back down, bobbing his head as fast as he could, pressing his tongue wherever it wanted to go. When he tried to come up for air again, Richie came with a loud moan against his hole, his cum shooting onto Eddie’s lips and dripping down his dick to pool at the base.

Eddie had gasped at the sight, licking the substance from his lips before he was suddenly pulled back by hands around his waist, effectively sitting on the other’s face, _“_ _ Shit _ _!”_ Eddie yelled, feeling Richie’s tongue immediately press inside, licking out of him hungrily. “Fuck,  _ Richiiiee,” _ he moaned.

The dark-haired boy held his hips, pulling him against his mouth over and over again in a way that he was practically being fucked by his tongue. His eyes rolled into the back of his head, reaching down to place his own hands over Richie’s larger ones. “Oh  _ shit,  _ oh  _ fuck- _ ” One of his hands shot up to cover his mouth, the boy beneath him reaching to grab his dick and pump it with fever, making him come undone way too fast, still wildly thrashing his tongue around inside of him.

Eddie came with a cry, releasing all over Richie’s chest and stomach. He fell forward onto his hands, the other trying to catch his torso so he wouldn’t get hurt whilst simultaneously wetly gasping for air.

They both took a moment to catch their breath. Eddie felt beads of sweat run down his neck, wiping his forehead with the back of his hand. “Christ,” he quietly said, nearly giving a laugh.

He heard Richie say, “C’mere,” so he weakly spun around to look at him. His hair was pushed back, face impossibly red. His glasses had been set on the bedside table, so his brown eyes were out in the open and staring at him.

Eddie couldn’t look away, his lips parting. He slipped the Hawaiian shirt from his shoulders to drop back on the floor, it had become slightly dampened from sweat. The other had his arms stretched out, hands gliding over his back. “We have to clean everything up first,” Eddie said, moving in to give him a peck on the lips. He was stopped, however, hearing what he said before he could connect their mouths.

“Leave it,” Richie had told him.

Eddie swallowed and almost whimpered, closing the gap between them quickly to kiss him. After, he gently laid down on top of him, feeling the hot sticky cum between them spread. He hid his face in his neck, Richie’s arms circling him. “Shit, Eds.” he ran his long fingers through his hair, scratching his scalp delicately. “Do you make those noises on purpose?”

“What noises?”

_ “Fuck,”  _ Richie said. His chest was rising and falling quickly, making the boy on top of him sway.

Eddie kissed his neck, wondering what their friends were doing, what their parents were doing. He couldn’t imagine it though, only able to hear their breathing and outside noises, birds talking, neighbors chatting, a plane going overhead. He sighed, trying to think of what he should say. He eventually came up with nothing, letting himself just enjoy this quiet little moment of silence. 

His attention was turned to the wetness between them, making him feel jittery and restless at the feeling. What would they do next? Eddie had wondered. He felt a little hazy from his orgasm still, trying to think coherent thoughts. He knew, whatever they would be doing, he would enjoy. There was something so different about doing this with Richie, his best friend since he could remember. He didn’t know what would happen to them after that day, after they had already confessed so much to each other. It scared him a little, knowing there was something else he needed to recognize, something underlying and subconscious. He had almost figured it out, but now he had lost whatever it was. It made him anxious, his stomach turning. Eddie just shut his eyes tight and breathed to get through it.

When they were both ready to go again they had already started to lazily makeout, too sweet and shy for anyone to even guess what they had been doing prior. The cum between them had not dried, being trapped between their moist heated bodies. And  _ fuck _ , was it gross just sitting there. Eddie’s eyelashes fluttered at it soaking there, desperate to make  _ more _ . Richie sat up to lay Eddie on the opposite end of the bed, crawling down to lay between his legs. “ _ Rich _ , your blanket,” Eddie warned, remembering the cum that had pooled at the base of his member as well as the cum on his chest.

Richie shrugged. “Fuck it.” He had replaced his glasses on his face so he could see, his vision immeasurably terrible without them.

Eddie grinned. He looked down at his chest, slowly moving his hand up to drag it through the cum there, entranced by it. It was his own, so, it wasn’t too interesting. But, the idea of Richie’s was a different story. He watched Richie quirk an eyebrow at him as he started mouthing at Eddie’s dick, his tongue poking out to lick his shaft.

“Rich,” he softly moaned, absentmindedly pushing his finger into his mouth. His back was sticking to the bed with sweat, the heat affecting him worse now. He had a plan. “Come kiss me.”

Richie slowly moved forward, smiling and nearly laughing with happiness to do exactly that. Eddie took no time to reach down and grab his half-hard dick, pumping it twice before pulling his mouth away. “Here,” Eddie instructed, looking down.

Richie looked down between them as well, eyes taking in the scene first.

Eddie pushed his hips up, his own member making contact with the other’s. Richie then understood, dropping his hips so Eddie could (try to, at least) wrap his hand around the both of them. Richie bit his lip and gave an experimental thrust forward, hissing out at the feeling. He looked up at Eddie to stare at his eyes, placing his hand over Eddie’s to grip them as well.

Eddie was already panting when Richie started to slowly thrust. The humidity was getting to him, making him squirm. He whined and rocked his body, throwing his head back. When Richie got faster he could feel the boy’s sweat drip from his hair onto his neck. It didn’t last long though, the other releasing them and pulling him up on his knees. Eddie dropped his head onto his shoulder, smelling their Summer sweat. Richie grabbed them once again, letting the palm of his hand cradle Eddie’s cheek to press his mouth on his neck, making him tilt his chin over.

And then, Richie had started to lick the sweat from his neck greedily, sucking and tasting there. Out of nowhere he reached to grip Eddie’s arm, raising it to the air.

“Shit-”

Richie licked a striped up his armpit, tongue gathering the sweat that had collected in the hairless area.

“Fucking disgusting,” Eddie mumbled, rocking his hips forward and getting the chills up his arms.

He kept licking there, mouthing at any place he could reach, eating the cum from his chest and moaning against his skin. They both were panting, covered in sweat and cum and burning heat, thrusting into their fists. Richie was chanting his name between licks, Eddie too blissed out to acknowledge it. They were leaning against each other now, neither making coherent statements. Well, until Eddie let out a, “ _ Come on me please, please come on me _ .”

Richie pulled back, hurriedly grabbing his hips to spin him around and softly push him to his hands and knees, sticking his cock in between his ass cheeks to get off.

Eddie yelled with pleasure, hand still on his dick.  _ “Please please please please- _ ”

Richie made a loud noise, Eddie feeling hot wet cum shooting over his hole and drip down his balls, sending his whole body to stutter, mouth gaping. Richie made quick work, dropping down to pull his dick back, licking from the tip over his shaft and up his balls, gliding over his hole, collecting the cum in his mouth before he spat it back out on Eddie’s opening. Eddie nearly screamed, going on and on about how fucking dirty and disgusting that was, flesh tingling as he came all over Richie’s bed and nearly spaced out.

And, well, fuck.

Eddie weakly turned around only to collapse into his arms, both boys falling down into the bed with their chests speedily expanding. They smelled like each other, but Eddie barely noted it, feeling too exhausted to. When he spoke he nearly cried, but held it together. “Okay, next time we need to go through with it, Rich. I can’t do this shit any longer.” 

Richie nodded against his face, breathing in loudly. “I told you so,” he barely said, sounding like he could die any moment.

“Shut the fuck up,” he complained with the last of his energy. He was shaking, bringing his hands to drag up his face and push back his damp hair (which used to be perfectly styled earlier in the day, but was now a complete mess). He could feel Richie’s spit drip down from where it had landed, giving a small gasp at it. “I can’t believe you did that . . . what the fuck . . .”

He rested a limp hand on his damp back, saying, “Was it okay?”

Eddie nodded, unable to find enough courage to say it out loud. Of course it was okay, it was more than okay. Eddie hadn’t ever thought anyone would ever do something like that with him, as well as do what they were about to. To have someone like that who completely understands him and who gladly partakes in Eddie’s fantasies. Who he can also do the same with. And it was  _ Richie _ of all people. Stupid loud vulgar beautiful Richie. Eddie’s own best friend for so long who was so much more now, whatever it was that they had become. They had been together for as long as he could remember, changing from year to year yet staying the same figure to one another. It was then in that moment, the boys lying exhausted together, when Eddie realized what had been bugging him for so long. The reason starting even farther back in their past, before he had even recognized that there was something there.

He lay, shocked with himself, and peeked up at Richie’s face. He looked to him as well, something in his eyes that told him that he must’ve been feeling the same way, but Eddie was too scared to bring it up. 

There was always something in the back of his mind that kept him from doing what he wanted.

So, he rested his head back down, shutting his eyes and letting his eyelashes fan over his freckled cheeks as he waited for the main event with more worry than he had had in a while.

It both felt like years and mere minutes when they were ready, Eddie being the first to sit up and look down at the other. There was an uneasy silence in the room, despite the window being open. It had all become background noise at some point, the boy wishing he could tune in and listen to the sounds but his mind too full of thoughts to follow through with it. 

For some reason, Eddie was feeling self-conscious. He was suddenly aware that he was naked, even though he had been that way for a while now. The cum on him was sticky and would’ve dried if it wasn’t for all the heat, indescribably gross, something he assumed he’d like if he was turned on.

Richie below him slowly sat up, adjusted the glasses on his face (Eddie couldn’t believe how they hadn’t fallen off yet), and pushed his hair away from his forehead. He could see the heat affecting him, making his movements slow and ears pink. He looked Eddie in the eyes as if searching for something.

Eddie pulled his head back a bit at this, wondering what he could be looking for. What was in himself that Richie wanted to know? He blinked a few times, running his tongue across the edge of his lip to wet it. Paying no more attention to the expression of the other because it had started to frighten him, the way he didn’t know if whatever the other was looking for was inside of him or not, he asked, “Should I- Should I, like,  _ prep _ myself? It’s okay if you don't want to do it . . .” But, in fact, he really wanted the other to do it. At night, when he let his fingers wander over his skin, he had always imagined it was not his own hands but Richie’s. He had never fully pushed more than the pad of his finger past his opening, hadn’t even started exploring that until he had sat in Richie’s lap in Mike’s car. He always hesitated, thinking that if it would be his first, he wanted Richie there to do it for him. Eddie knew this was silly in retrospect, the fact that most people didn’t even care about that kind of thing and also the notion that Richie might not even want to do it in the first place.

But, of course, for whatever reason Richie’s eyes expanded and his lips parted in reaction. “No, it’s fine. I can do it for you,” he told him quietly. “It’d be . . . I’d be fine with doing it.”

Eddie nodded, a breath catching in his throat. The humid air stuck to his skin like fresh paint, weighing him down. He was sure after this was all over he’d sleep for days straight, Richie right along with him. Forgetting this he uneasily moved to the side so they could switch places, snaking around the boy to put his back to the headboard. He glanced behind him so he could set up the two pillows that were lying there so he had something to lean on. After, Eddie looked to Richie, eyeing him as if to ask if he was sure about this.

“You ready?” Richie asked him, sounding extremely fond yet also scared out of his mind.

He nodded, scooching his hips forward so he could lay back on the pillows. When he was settled, he pressed his knees together, turning his head as he watched Richie lean over to grab the bottle of lube from the bedside table. He turned it in his hands, examining it before sneaking a glance up at Eddie. He looked away just as fast, softly popping the lid open. Eddie observed him tip it upside down, squeezing the bottle to squirt a glob on his fingertips. Richie snapped the lid shut, dropping the container next to him. He viewed Eddie’s legs, his lips pressed together, before he gently placed his free hand on one of his knees, coaxing him to part them. This touch made Eddie breathe out a slow breath, biting his top lip before spreading his legs to give him access. The boy looked away, the thing that had been bothering him for so long stuck, indenting in his brain. He clenched his jaw, warning himself not to say anything, nothing that could ruin their friendship forever.

Eddie jumped when he felt the cold substance against his hole, hissing out in reaction.

“Oh, shit, sorry, I’m sorry,” Richie said, flustered.

“It’s alright,” Eddie told him, eyebrows furrowed. He quickly got used to it, the cool feeling actually relaxing him, a stark contrast to the warmth of the room. 

Richie had slowly traced around his rim with the pad of his thumb, eyes fixated on it as he coated it with the lube. The spit and cum that was there had dripped onto the bed, soaking into the blanket. Richie didn’t seem even slightly bothered, taking his time and being ever so gentle with the boy. His free hand was now on Eddie’s thigh, thumb soothing over his tensed muscles. “Okay, I’m going to put one inside now, okay?” he said.

Eddie nodded, replying, “Okay.” He held his breath in anticipation, readying himself for whatever new sensation he would get from this, not knowing if it would be good or bad.

Turns out, it was good. Really good.

Richie had pushed his finger tentatively inside of him, constantly looking back up at Eddie to see how he was doing, what he looked like. He did it slow and steady, stopping only until he reached the hilt of his finger. 

Eddie didn’t know what he presumed to feel, but the outcome was completely unexpected.  _ Richie’s _ finger was inside of him, warm and slick. He trembled at the notion, tempted to reach down and grab himself. He was hard, precum starting to accumulate at the tip, which had him nearly insane with the idea that something much bigger would be inside of him soon, making the feeling ten times better. “I’m okay,” he assured Richie, knowing the other boy was worried, feeling it radiating off of him.

Richie looked down to his hand, relieved, as he started to move his digit inside of him, halfway out and then back inside, pushing on his walls and practically massaging him from the inside out.

It was a weird sensation for a brief moment, something that quickly turned into burning hot pleasure shooting up through his nerves. The way Richie was taking his time with it, completely focusing on doing it right, made it that way. His dedication to Eddie made the boy nearly melt, his hips moving on their own to meet his movements. Richie looked up at him at this, eyes wide with want. “I like it, Rich- I- Fuck, I shouldn’t like this, but you-” He cut himself off, heart stopping realizing he almost slipped, almost revealed what he was set on keeping a secret for the rest of his life.

Richie hadn’t noticed, too enthralled with the small noises Eddie was making. He gave a single kiss to his thigh as he continued, sliding his finger in and out but never tearing his eyes away from the boy in front of him. When a few minutes had passed he asked, “Eds, should I put two in?”

Eddie moaned at this for multiple reasons. One, apparently because of his nickname that Richie had called him for their entire lives, even though he always said he hated it (for some reason in this instant Eddie had found it immensely endearing and special). Two, because of the thought of another finger being added made him want to die in a good way. And, three, because of the word  _ in _ . The way he so nonchalantly said it, like it was a normal thing, like Richie wasn’t talking about putting his own fingers up Eddie’s ass so he could stretch him out enough to put his cock inside of him.

So, yes. He responded with yes.

Two fingers, apparently, was a little different than one. It burned when he started to press them inside, Eddie gripping the pillow he rested on. Richie’s fingers were long and slender, thin but still a bit too much for it to be comfortable. Richie paused his hand, eyebrows shifting on his face while he looked at Eddie. This time, Eddie didn’t tell him he was okay, he bit his lip and looked up to the ceiling as he tried to get used to the feeling. Richie’s free hand had now started rubbing small circles into his thigh, his mouth darting down to kiss along behind his fingertips. 

Eddie had a moment to think, to understand what they were doing fully. His chest tightened like he was about to have a panic attack, but Richie below him continued to press assurance to his thighs which told Eddie that what they were doing was right.  _ Richie was the right in his world of wrong. _ His eyes nearly welled with tears, inhaling a watery breath. He kept quiet though, clenching his jaw and not showing his eyes to the other. “You can keep going.”

“Are you okay?” Richie immediately asked, hearing his voice and noticing everything that Eddie didn’t want him to, of course.

Eddie nodded. “Yes. I promise,” he told him, looking down at his face.

Richie observed him for a few seconds longer, surveying his features and eventually settling. Giving one last kiss to his skin as he deemed Eddie was telling through truth, slowly pushing his fingers further inside of him. When he reached the hilt, Eddie squirmed, it was a tight fit. But, Richie got him through it, softly working them inside of him and taking his time so the boy wouldn’t feel any pain. He felt the need to thank him, to sit up so he could kiss him on the mouth. He didn’t however, although he was greatly tempted to. The two digits inside of him scissored around each other, rubbing his insides in a gentle manner. He gave a moan, oddly, not even realizing he liked the sensation now. And watching Richie’s jaw slightly go slack, his lips parting at him made it even better. 

“Put another in,” Eddie said- No,  _ told _ .

“But, you-”

“Please, “ he cut him off. “Put another one in.”

Richie, hesitating, pulled out to push three inside of him, immediately causing Eddie to groan and furrow his eyebrows at the tightness. He kneaded his fingers against his walls, pushing and rubbing and scissoring carefully. Eddie had thrown his head back, foot shaking against the comforter. “Shit,” he let out. He didn’t know whether to cry or to moan, but knew he wanted whatever it was that he was getting. When, after a few minutes, Richie’s slow motions had become too much, Eddie had finally let out a, “I think I’m ready, Richie.”

He looked up at him like he had the air knocked from his lungs, brown eyes behind his glasses wide and unblinking. “You sure?”

“Mhmm,” Eddie guaranteed, knowing it was time.

Richie gave a small nod before pulling his fingers uncomfortably out of Eddie’s entrance, wiping them on the bed.

“Gross,” Eddie said quietly, moving to sit up, the word making Richie give a small smile.

Prior to this, the two boys had both agreed that Eddie would ride the other, so he could control how things went down for his own sake. This was making his pulse speed up, knowing he would have Richie’s undivided attention, he would be out in the open and be the one who was moving to make them feel good. It made him very nervous as he watched Richie move to lie on his back as Eddie made room or him, the tall boy resting his head on the pillows now.

They eyed each other anxiously, both of their chests rising and falling with enormous speed. Eddie looked down as he threw a knee over Richie’s stomach, keeping his gaze away from his dick. There was the silence again, loud and overflowing in Eddie’s ears. He swallowed hard and slumped forward so he could kiss Richie.

Richie grabbed his face softly, kissing him back. They pulled away slightly to look at each other, both nodding and assuring the other.

Eddie moved to sit back up on his knees, face threatening to set ablaze from how hot it was. He reached down to grab the bottle of lube beside them, popping it open uneasily and squeezing some out on the palm of his hand. He clicked it shut and leaned over to set it back on the bedside table. Then, scooching back a bit, he reached to grip Richie’s hard, leaking member to cover it in the substance. Richie hissed at the feeling, at the cold and the sensation. When he was satisfied with it he moved forward once again, positioning his shaking hips where they needed to be. Eddie braced himself with one of his hands on Richie’s shoulder, using his other to align Richie’s dick with his hole.

In his mind, he was screaming at himself the words that had been unspoken his entire life, the thing he had promised himself he’d never say out loud. But it hurt to hold them in, his throat was burning and clenching, trying to get them out.  _ Shut up, Eddie, _ he told himself.  _ Keep your mouth shut.  _

The tip of his cock pressed against him, slightly pushing on it. A noise released from his throat, deep and smooth. Eddie had lowered himself down, feeling pain shoot up into his hips.  _ “Ow _ ,” he whimpered, half because of the feeling and half because of what he wanted to say. Tears had pricked the boy’s eyes, burning as he shut them.

Riche’s wide hands were on him quick, grazing over his waist to steady and comfort him.

This only made it worse, Eddie biting his lip so hard he thought it would leak blood. He lowered his head so Richie couldn’t see him, couldn’t ask what was wrong. He was afraid if he asked, then he would tell. 

So, Eddie sank down further, taking Richie halfway to the hilt. He pressed his eyebrows together, urging himself to keep going. When he finally made it all the way down, effectively sitting on his cock, he let out a breath in exasperation. 

“You okay? Does it hurt?” Richie asked, hands petting over his hips and thighs.

“Yes,” he responded to both questions, unable to control himself from letting out a small breath that sounded like a cry. “I’m fine,” he said before Richie asked, covering his own mouth with the palm of his hand afterward.

It took some time to get used to the feeling and he still wasn’t sure if he was when he had started to work his hips a small amount forward and back, rocking them. Richie let out a noise in front of him, but he didn’t look up, only focused on moving. As he started to go faster, his eyes were welling up like before, his lips pulling back.  _ Shut up, Eddie _ , he thought once again, then telling himself how stupid he was to think such things that his body was trying to force him to say out loud. Or was that his mother's voice? Eddie lifted up to drop back down and it felt good now, but he couldn’t enjoy it.

Picking up speed only made his head pound with unsaid words, his shoulders shaking. He couldn’t do it anymore, he couldn’t. He needed to say it out loud, to the boy under him. So, Eddie shut himself up in his head, letting his heart take the lead.

He looked up at Richie, let out a sob, and said,  _ “Richie, I love you.” _

He couldn’t help the tears from streaming down his face, viewing the other boy’s own watery eyes. He was starting to cry as well.

In a matter of moments, Richie sprung to sit up, moving his hips up to meet with Eddie’s own motions as he wrapped his arms around the small boy. He stuck his face in his neck, crying,  _ “I love you too, I love you so much-” _

Eddie sobbed into his hair, hugging Richie’s shoulders to his chest as they writhed against each other. Richie’s cock had buried itself deep inside of him, being thrust in and out and over again, hitting a place Eddie couldn’t explain if he tried to. It made him shout a moan as he wept, trying to get that same feeling every time he dropped his hips.

“ _ Fuck _ , Eddie,  _ Eds- _ ”

“ _ Richie _ ,” he moaned, pulling back to force his mouth on his, quieting both of them as they wetly made out. He could feel Richie’s tears on his cheeks, his own on Richie’s. A wave of blissful freedom was sent through him, parting from Richie to press their foreheads together. He started blabbering out things he couldn’t remember, things like, “You make me feel so good,” and, “You’re inside of me,” and, “I love you more than anything.”

Richie listened to it all, moaning and crying and responding with sweet responses. 

He didn’t know how long they were at it for, it seemed like forever and a blink of an eye at the same time, something Eddie was okay with because he had never been happier doing something in his life, something he would never regret. Richie was thrusting up into him, finally reaching to grab Eddie's dick to pump it. “I’m gonna come, “ Richie told him, sweat dripping down their backs.

Eddie moaned, dropping his head to Richie’s shoulder, thighs burning as he continued to move his hips. “Inside of me,” he groaned. He sped up his momentum throwing his head back whilst tears still squeezed from the corners of his eyes, causing Richie’s hips to stutter, starting a chain reaction in events. He shoved himself as deep as he could into Eddie, coming inside of him, which caused Eddie to release between them.

The two boys rode out their orgasms, Eddie’s eyes nearly rolling so far back into his head to cause him a headache. Richie fell back, Eddie falling on top of him, gasping for air. He had pulled off of his cock, feeling the hot cum slip down inside of him. “ _ Richie _ ,” he mindlessly whispered, his cheek against his shoulder. 

“Holy shit,” Richie cursed. He kissed the top of Eddie’s head again and again, nuzzling there. “I fucking love you, I mean it, fuck, I love you so much, Eddie-”

He thought he was done with crying, but he let out one last small sob, pushing up on his weak elbows to kiss Richie. “You too,” he said against his lips.

They had to pull away quickly, both still out of breath and aching. 

“We need to take showers right fucking now, we’re so gross,” Eddie said with a sniffle, lying back down where he was.

Richie gave a laugh. “Jesus, you’re an entirely different person when your dick’s hard, Eds.”

“Beep beep, Richie.”

Richie paused for a moment. “Let’s just lie here for a while.”

Eddie seemed to like this idea, even if they were kind of gross, he could wait a little while longer. He snuggled against Richie, blowing out a breath.

As they lay there, tangled with each other, Eddie thought of many things. The biggest revelation he had had was that maybe change didn’t have to be so bad. At first, he thought it was something wrong, something that was stripping away what made him special and stripping away the things he found most important in life. Forgetting who he was. But, maybe change didn’t mean he had to forget. Maybe it meant he just made room in his heart for new things, new experiences. He could keep those memories for himself and be glad to grow, to become better. To become someone who he was proud of.

And as he thought this, he could almost feel the wind blowing against his face as he opened the car window. Eddie could hear the soft rock music playing from the radio as he looked beside him to see Richie Tozier sitting there, a large smile stretched across his face as they left their hometown behind, the memories of his childhood still burned into his mind as he smiled back.


End file.
